Page 24 of October

I move quietly through his bedroom and the rest of the house to gather my things. I’m grateful to have the weekend off. I need the time to figure out what I’m going to do about this now.

Did he just want to fuck me?

That doesn’t feel right either.

All I know is I need to get out of this house.

I don’t leave a note.

I don’t say a thing to him.

I just get in my car and cry the entire way home.

Chapter 14

Wren

I have barely leftmy bed since I collapsed onto it more than forty-eight hours ago. My limbs feel heavy. Even thinking about lifting them to anything other than normal necessities feels like I’m staring up a mountainside with no strength left.

I knew, when the time inevitably came, that our relationship would be forever changed by what we’d done, but the hopeless romantic in me hoped it would be different.

How fucking stupid am I?

My throat begins to ache again as tears start building in my eyes, so I pull the covers up over my head and beg for sleep to take me again.

“Wren?” I hear a voice say from another room. “Wren?” it says again.

I know it’s Lyla. I don’t need to answer. She’ll find me.

Sure enough, a few moments later, the door to my bedroom opens and I hear the pad of her now bare feet across my floor and toward my bed. She always leaves her shoes by the door when she comes into someone's house. Product of a clean freak mother, I suppose.

I peek my head out from underneath the covers, and when she gets a look at my unwashed, mascara-covered face, she frowns.

“Oh, honey…” she says softly before sitting on the mattress next to me and placing her hand on my shoulder.

“That bad, huh?”

“I know you’re sad, and I get it but, babe, we need to get you up and out of this bed. We will get you showered, wash your face, and brush out your hair, okay? That will make you feel better. Even if just physically.”

I want to fight her on this because I’d much rather rot away in this bed, but Lyla is nothing, if not persistent.

And bossy.

“Okay,” I tell her.

“Wow, I expected a bit more of a pushback on this. I’m proud of you.”

“It’s because I just don’t have the energy to fight you on this… and I’m a little scared of you.” I take her hand and she helps me sit up.

I don’t know why but as soon as I’m upright, my heart breaks all over again. The moment I see her face and the sadness in her eyes for me, I start to cry.

“I really miss him, Lyla. I didn’t expect it to hurt this much.” I place my hands on my chest then lean into her, resting my head on her shoulder.

She wraps her arms around me and squeezes me tight. “I know, babe, I know, but you did the right thing by leaving. You put yourself out there and were honest with him. That’s all you could have done.”

“I feel like such an idiot. I’ve never said I love you first. I’m too guarded for that, and of course, the first time I do, he shuts down on me.”

“Listen to me.” She takes my face in her hands and holds my gaze. “You are beautiful, strong, and incredible. If he doesn’t see that then fuck him, okay?”

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