Page 161 of Callan

What has life come to?

I’m sitting here, grieving the only thing I can’t have.

A cold red sunset splashes over the road as I turn the ignition on and do one last thing for her. Or rather myself.

I roll my car down the street and check the neighborhood, making sure nothing weird is going on.

One of my men already surveils the street, and that is my consolation. At least she has protection.

As I slide past her building, nothing unusual catches my eye.

I slow down as I look up. Carmen’s windows are dark. And so are Mackenzie’s, which fills me with dread.

I pull my car to the side and call my man.

“Have you seen her?” I ask when he picks up.

“Yes. She went inside and then walked out, wearing different clothes. Then she crossed the street and kept walking.”

I tense up.

“Where was she headed?”

“One of my men says she walked past him. He's followed her to a store a couple blocks from here. He’s there, waiting for her.”

“Tell him to leave. I’ll take over.”

“Okay, Boss.”

We end the call, and I veer my car away and follow the lead.

Shortly after, I find a parking spot and pull my car to a stop.

Cold air nips at my face when I climb out and pop my collar.The snow crunches beneath my feet as I lock my car and cross the street.

It’s a small store with fresh vegetables and fruit. An Italian store.

She’s shopping inside.It makes sense. She hasn’t been home in three days.

I find myself standing in the middle of the sidewalk, people going past me, entering and exiting the store, while I watch her through the window store like a pervert.

“Sorry,” a woman says, snagging my elbow while having a hard time with a bag of groceries and a small kid.

A strap of the paper bag slips off her hand, and a couple of mandarines roll out and hit the pavement.

She spends a second transferring the bag from one hand to another while trying to convince her kid to stay still when I reach down and collect the fruit for her.

“Thank you,” she says.

I put them back into her grocery bag. She thanks me again, and I move closer to the window.

Mackenzie is no longer in my line of sight, and I peer around the store, annoyed. About a dozen people are in the store, shopping.

I still can’t see her.

Maybe I should go back and forget about her. Yeah, maybe… If there is a moment to make a stupid decision, this probably is.

Still undecided, I move to the side so I’m not creating hazardous conditions for moms with little kids.

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