Page 187 of Callan

Again, this is not for everyone.

Things are great now as we sit at the table, talk about little nothings, enjoy our food, and fuck later in the other room.

But real life is different.

Yet, as I pour her a drink, and she talks about how she hasn’t planned to celebrate New Year’s Eve, let alone with me, I can’t stop imagining her at my arm, living better times with me.

Having my babies and building a family with me.

Maybe in a less stressful setting.

Sadly, I’ve been born into this life and can’t just simply walk away.

You have to live it, and sometimes, the ones you love pay the harshest price for being in your life.

My mother had no say in my father’s business, yet she was there on that fatal day.

Till death do us part.

Those words couldn’t ring truer that day.

Ewan and Duncan lost more than their parents that day, and their lives have never been the same.

Not that mine and my younger brother have.

At any rate, I shouldn’t get lost in a thicket of thoughts that do us no good.

We finish the main course and indulge in our desserts.

“So…” I say. “Where do you see me living?”

A smile tilts her lips.

“Hmm…” she murmurs before sighing, making me dip my stare to her chest.

I see my lips trailing down and biting the swell of her boobs before sucking on her nipples.

“Honestly…” she says, setting her dessert spoon down and leaning back, tossing a glance at me.

She catches me staring like I’ve never seen breasts in my life.

I lift my gaze, without flinching, and for a moment there, we’re not thinking about our conversation, the impression I have made on her, or what tomorrow might bring.

For a second there, all I see is her need to writhe under my body, and all I feel is my cock hardening.

Awaiting her response, I secretly slide a hand under the table and adjust myself.

Thankfully, she doesn’t notice me doing that.

“It’s hard to tell where I see you living. I still don’t know a lot about you,” she says, a cloud darkening her eyes, and my awareness sharpens.

I can still lose this woman over some faulty step.

We might not have a future together, but that doesn’t mean that we have to knowingly walk into a disaster.

“What would you like to know?” I ask, feeling generous tonight.

I could spill out a thing or two about my real life.

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