Page 69 of Prince of Shadow and Ash

Chapter 26

“YOU KNOW WHAT MOTHERwould say?” Minerva sat on Adelaide’s cot. Early evening light still filtered through the heavy green fabric of the tent. A few candles illuminated the interior—her cot on a small wooden frame, Giselle’s straw mattress in the corner, and a trunk with a cloak on it. A large rug covered most of the ground.

Adelaide sat on a stool, looking at her reflection in a small mirror hung on the tent wall. She stuck another pin in her hair to hold the ribbon-accented braid in place atop her head. “Probably something cautionary I don’t want to hear.”

“She’d probably say you can’t go getting swept off your feet by any good swordsman.”

“I’m not in love with him because he’s a good swordsman.” She stuck in another pin.

“Ah, but you admit you’re in love with him.”

“What? I—” She jabbed herself in the head with a pin and winced. “In loveis a little much. Besides, I thought you were supporting this...whatever it is?”

“Courtship?”

She glared at Minerva. “We’re not courting.”

“Not officially,” Minerva smirked, “but you might as well be. Gracious, after his victory I thought you two were going to kiss. And not the little peck I saw you give him.”

“Hmph.” Adelaide turned back to the mirror, trying to act nonchalant. There was a moment there...he had been so close. She had felt a fluttering in her stomach. The look in his eyes, intense as a bonfire yet clear as an undisturbed lake on a cool morning. She hadwantedhim to kiss her. To put his hand behind her head and pull her in. For a moment, she had considered kissing him herself. But then that look of pain. That... Sadness in his eyes.

She tried to ignore the nagging impression something was wrong. Maybe she saw in him what she felt in herself. That feeling of lying. Of hiding the truth. When he reminded her of the cut on his leg, she had wanted to heal it. She could have insisted she go with him to the physician’s tent, pulled him aside on the way and healed him. Good as new.

As soon as the idea had occurred to her, she decided against it. Not yet. But if she couldn’t trust him now, could she ever trust him? Was her hesitance only the echoes of warnings from her parents? Or something more? What should she do when her heart screamed to trust him and her mind urged caution?

Minerva laid a hand on her shoulder. “What are you thinking?”

“About why—or if—I trust Regulus.” Adelaide chewed on her lower lip. “I’m too used tonottrusting. How do I know if I should? Father always says to never let emotions make your decisions. But when your emotions are so involved, how can you tell if you’re being rational or not? Am I paranoid not to trust him? Am I foolishtotrust him?”

Minerva squeezed her shoulder. “These are things you can determine with time, Ad. You don’t need to decide if you’re marrying him today. Sooner or later, you’ll know. Like I knew with Gaius.”

“Yes, but you didn’t have a secret.”

“I knew yours. I still keep that one.”

Adelaide paused, her hands poised above her head as she checked the braid. “I’m sorry. It can’t be easy.”

Minerva shrugged and stroked her growing belly. “Sometimes, I’d like to talk to him. It’s not that I don’t trust him; I know if I told him he wouldn’t tell a soul. But it’s not my secret to share.”

“But it is mine.” Adelaide dropped her hands to her lap. “What if...” She fiddled with the belt of her dress. “What if I tell him, and it’s not that he wants to use my power, or he tells someone he shouldn’t? What if...”

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