Page 11 of The Things That Hold Us

I feel emotions start to bubble up, but I know if Cass comes back and see’s that I’ve been crying, she’ll want to talk. And I’m not in the mood right now. I click the TV off before I can think too hard, and close my eyes for a minute.

25 minutes later, I’m woken up by Cassie nudging me and handing me an iced coffee and a muffin.

“You went back to sleep?” she asks.

I nod, finally sitting up all the way. “Yeah, my head was hurting too bad.” I lie, and instantly feel bad about it. But technically it's not a complete lie.

She sits and takes a bite of her food. “So I was thinking about your party. What if we have it on the roof? We still have some warmth, so we wouldn't freeze.”

“What roof?” I ask, confused.

She nudges my leg, “My roof. At my apartment. It could be pretty. We could have string lights and everything.”

I groan. “I really don’t want a party, Cass. Who would we invite anyways? My circle is very small, if you haven't noticed.”

Don’t get me wrong, I have friends. But only a few close ones. Plus, I don’t like the idea of an entire night revolving around me. It’s just odd.

“Charlie. You’re turning 30. Please let me celebrate you.” She asks with her bottom lip stuck out.

I roll my eyes, but before I can say anything, she adds, “Plus, I kinda already invited your mom.”

I feel my eyes bulge out of my head.

“Youwhat? Cassie, why.”

“It’s your 30th. You only turn 30 once. And I’m not even planning a big party, just something chill and relaxing.”

“You don't do chill and relaxing.” I scoff.

“But you do, I promise this won’t be a Cassie party.”

I eye her cautiously. I love her but she can go overboard real fast when it comes to parties.

“Ok fine. But you have to promise me it won’t get out of hand. Just a calm party.”

“I promise,” she smiles, then adds, “Calm party. I got this.”

Her smile tells me otherwise.

We eat our breakfast while she shows me ideas for my birthday, and it’s surprisingly not terrible.

She shows me an inspiration picture with a wall of twinkle lights that are also flowers, and I actually love it.

I’ve never been the girlie type. I’d rather wear t-shirts and leggings or jeans than get dressed up. But I’vealwaysbeen a sucker for twinkle lights, and all things plants/flowers.

“I’ll set up a table with drinks, and of course get you your favorite sparkling wine. And we can make cupcakes instead of a cake, that way everyone gets something without ordering a huge cake.” she says.

I hold up a hand as a thought suddenly coming to me.

“Wait, Cass. This seems really expensive, who’s paying for all of this?”

I suddenly feel very guilty, and aware that budget or spending money was never discussed. I don't mind paying forit, but she said she's throwing the party, and I feel bad for just assumingshe'spaying for it.

“Don’t worry about it. When I called your mom and explained everything, she gave me her credit card and told me to go nuts.”

Of course she did.

My mom. Always paying for everything.

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