Page 3 of Children of Fallen Gods

“I think I have the mental capacity to be equally concerned about all of it, personally,” Max muttered, and I placed my hand over his. His fingers rearranged around mine instinctively, warm and familiar.

“What do you think we will find? When we return?”

He was silent for a long moment. “I think that it doesn’t make sense,” he said, at last. “I think that Nura has been too quiet. I think that Sesri’s reign is a strange battle for the Orders to choose. And I think that they’re desperate, and that’s the thing that scares me most, because I don’t know why. So I don’t know what we’re going to come home to, but I know I don’t like it.”

When we get back,Nura had said to me,I hope you’re ready to fight like hell.

I had no choice but to be ready. I was surrounded by reminders of all that depended on me. Eight years ago, my mother had kissed me on the forehead and sent me, her only daughter, into a hideous and uncertain future. It was all so I could have a chance — just one chance at survival, atliving. And this was my only opportunity to make my life worth all of the ones I had seen snuffed out. There would be no more little girls torn away from their mothers in the night. No more mothers worked to death in the mines.

There was no sacrifice too great for that.

My gaze lifted to Max, to his far off stare. Guilt and affection tangled in my chest, each feeding off the other.

Max had already made so many sacrifices, more than anyone should ever have to suffer.

“I would understand,” I said, quietly.

His eyes flicked to me. “Hm?”

“I would understand if you cannot do this. If you can’t be in another war. I would understand.”

A shadow crossed his face, as if something painful had torn through him, then softened.

“If you can do it, I can do it.” His hand lifted to brush my cheek, then he said, more softly, “I don’t care what we’re walking into. You’re not going to do it alone.”

Gods. My gaze slipped out to the ocean, because suddenly, the sight of him — the sight of the way he looked at me — was too overwhelming. And for a moment, he made everything feel surmountable.

But then Reshaye’s voice unfurled in my mind like a thread of smoke in the darkness.

{He is right,}it whispered.{You are never alone.}

* * *

The next morning,I stood with Serel, leaning over the rail of the ship. I had barely gotten back to sleep the night before, but aside from aching eyes I wasn’t tired. Instead, I felt like electricity was running through me.

Beside me, Serel lifted his chin and blinked into the salty sea air.

“We’re arriving today, right?” he asked.

“The Syrizen say we’re close to shore. If it cleared up a bit, maybe we would be able to see the Towers by now.”

Serel let out a long, low whistle. “The Towers. What a sight that must be.”

“It’s really something.” There was no denying that. When I first came to Ara, I had been so feverish when I arrived that I barely remembered the journey. The only thing Ididremember was that sight — the Towers, framed above the imposing Aran cliffs. It had been so magnificent that it made everything inside of me go silent.

And for the first time in weeks, I had felthope.

Reshaye sniffed at the memory and let out a bitter chuckle.

{How foolish you were. How naive.}

“I never thought I would live to see it.” An easy smile still clung to Serel’s mouth, but his voice dipped a little as he said it, and I knew all the bittersweet depth hidden in that one sentence. A lump rose in my throat.

“You’ll love it,” I said.

I told myself it was true. Ithadto be true. Serel loved almost everything. He was effortlessly, ceaselessly optimistic. There was no reason why his feelings towards Ara would be any different. But still… there was so much he didn’t know. So much thatIdidn’t know.

I turned and looked out across the deck. Almost all of the passengers were up here now, which meant that it had become exceptionally crowded. But everyone knew how close we were to arriving, and no one was willing to miss the first glimpse of Ara.

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