Page 21 of Deceit & Desire

“Son of a bitch.” I growled the words through gritted teeth, my chest heaving with ragged, too-shallow breaths as I tried to pull my trapped hands free of his grip. “All the pieces are starting to click into place for me, Roman. You came to Miami twice a year every year? Suddenly, it makes sense that every boyfriend I had for the past ten years eventually ghosted me, no matter how interested they seemed at first. You’re the reason none of the relationships I tried to have while I was in Miami lasted more than six months, aren’t you?”

Roman grimaced and squeezed his eyes shut, seeming to deflate in the face of my question, but he still didn’t release me.

“Yes.” The admission came out ragged and hoarse, like he’d swallowed broken glass.

“Why?” My voice broke, and I tried to tug my hands free again, but it didn’t work. “Look me in the eye and tell me why, damn it! Did you think you owned me? Did you think of me as a misplaced object or a piece of property, something you could fucking fly across the country twice a year to lay claim to, so no other man could have me? Did you think you could just treat me like some kind of wayward possession?—”

“Stop!” Roman’s command was broken and raw as an open wound, bleeding with a strange vulnerability I’d never heard from him before. A mix of emotions I couldn’t begin to understand fought a war in his expression as he sucked in a deep breath, forced his eyes open, and met my gaze head-on.

I froze, suddenly unable to breathe through the thick, charged weight of the air between us. He didn’t blink, didn’t move, didn’t breathe for what felt like an eternity. He released my hands and my throat, moving to cup my face between his hands. The heat of his palms seared my cheeks as he leaned in close, his lips almost brushing mine when he spoke again.

“No, it was never about me treating you like you were a possession, baby. It’s you who has possessed me for as long as I can remember. From the first time I laid eyes on you and every second of my life after that, you’ve haunted me. Your name has always been branded on my heart. Like you told Miss Jackson, I’ve always been yours.”

The raw honesty in Roman’s gaze wrenched my heart, clawing it open, leaving it aching and bleeding for him. I opened my mouth to tell him I’d changed my mind about our fake engagement—and about my decision to marry him for real—but no sound came out. In the very next instant, his lips met mine in a searing kiss.

I can’t do this to him... shouldn’t let him shackle himself to a broken wreck of a woman like me. He deserves better, deserves more, deserves the world...

Despite my desperate attempts to cling to sanity and truth, when his tongue swept against the seam of my lips, I opened for him. Melting against him, I wound my arms around his neck, pressing as close as I could get, hungrily matching each stroke of his tongue.

I raked my fingers through his hair, moaning as I arched against him. My nipples pebbled into rock-hard points where my breasts crushed against his chest, and I silently cursed every single shred of clothing between us.

Roman growled in response, drinking in my moan like a man dying of thirst. His hands slid down from where they’d been cupping my face, blazing a trail of heat down my neck, over my chest, my waist, and my hips, until his massive hands settled on my ass like he owned it. He gripped me and groaned, his hands sliding lower until he held a thigh in each hand and lifted me off my feet, pinning me between him and the wall, easily hooking my legs around his waist before sliding his hands back up to knead the soft curves of my ass.

He broke our kiss just long enough to murmur, “You’re all mine, do you hear me?”

I nodded and pressed my lips against his again, losing myself in the sensation, in the heat, and need, and the gloriously hard feel of him pressing against the aching, throbbing heat between my legs as he leaned down to nibble on my neck, just beneath my ear.

“Hold on tight, baby.” His hoarse command sent a shiver of delight down my spine.

My only answer was to do as he said, wrapping my arms around his broad shoulders and gasping out a needy whimper as his teeth scraped against the thundering pulse point in my neck, then bit down hard enough to make me cry out with simultaneous pleasure and agony, leaving his mark on me as he carried me upstairs to his bedroom.

My breathing was ragged and choppy with anticipation by the time Roman laid me down on his bed, and I stifled a yelp of surprise when he climbed on top of me, both of us still fully clothed, and he pinned my wrists to the bed.

“Roman, what are you doing?” I whimpered, squirming beneath him, desperate for friction, needing to feel him inside me more than I needed my next breath.

He let his full body weight rest on top of me, pinned my wrists above my head with one hand, and stroked my hair with his other hand.

Roman nibbled on my earlobe and I thought I might spontaneously combust. “Look at me, baby, because you and I need to get something straight before this goes any further.”

I stifled the urge to cry and scream with frustration, but I did as he asked, looking Roman in the eye and giving him my full attention. “What do we need to get straight, Roman?”

Roman fisted the hand that had been stroking my hair, holding my head still, and the fear and uncertainty darkening his gaze as he stared down at me absolutely gutted me, leaving my stomach hollowed out by shame and mind dizzy and reeling with need. “I saw that damn leaving look in your eyes before I kissed you, and I’m not going to do this... we’re not going to do this if you’re just going to up and abandon me again the second your dad is on the mend.”

He rolled his hips, and I felt his thick, hard cock press into my belly. I trembled with need, pressing my thighs together, squirming beneath him and desperate for friction because if I didn’t get it soon, I was pretty sure I was going to die.

“God knows I want you, and you can feel how badly I do, but I’m not going to go there with you if you’re not really here for good, not really in it for the long haul with me like you said at the hospital. I’m not asking you to love me because I know that’s asking too much for a woman like you to love a man like me. But I am asking you to give me your word as a Brandt that you’re really going to stay and help me save this ranch like you said you would before this goes any further. Can you give me that, baby?”

Chapter8

It’s Always Both

PLAYLIST: ”TAKE ME TO CHURCH” BY HOZIER

ZOE

All it took was justone question to suck every molecule of oxygen out of the room. I bit my bottom lip, struggling to breathe, crushed underneath the anvil of guilt that had just dropped on my chest.

It’s not like I can be mad. It was a fair question, especially considering my track record for leaving when things get tough.

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