Page 105 of Quiet Burn

The anger rippling off of me scares the other freshman away as I enter our dorm and I grin to myself. Being royalanda dragon has benefits too numerous to name.

When I get to Salem’s room, I take a deep breath like Zavvie suggested. He thinks I need to clear my emotions before I deal with everyone, especially if the shrimp will be present. I’m not sure what he thinks will change, but he asks for very little. Besides, I would like for the only family I give a shit about not to give me angry looks constantly, so I’m playing along.

I open the door, blinking at the sight before me. Kit is in his chair and Xerxes is on his couch, but on the floor is my general and my thief, studiously painting their toenails.

What in the fucking shit is this?!

Salem is in the kitchen, cooking as usual, but I can’t even covet the delicious smells coming from his efforts because I’m so shocked. “What the hell are you two assholes doing?”

Slash whips his head around, his eyes dark with anger. “I am assisting the little demon with self-care as he has an injured limb. Oriel agreed to assist X.”

Oriel chuckles, his shoulders shaking as he finishes a toe. He studies the foot for a moment, then turns to look at me in exasperation. “Jas, you don’t care that we’re doing supposed girly shit, so stop it. I wear polish all the time, so does X. You’re pissed that we’re sitting below KK and X to do it, which is dumb. KK doesn’t even know the demon culture stuff yet, so chill.”

“What don’t I know?” the shrimp asks, looking curious. “Tell me why he’s got a crab in his ass again. I like knowing what makes him pissy.”

I’ll just bet you do, you little shit.

For the second time today, I smirk as I reply, “No one has permission to tell him and that’s a royal decree.” Slash’s expression says he’s going to murder me when he gets me alone, but the look of frustration on the new kid’s face is worth it.

I’m a twisted fuck, but at least I’m trying.

Over My Head

Kit/Kat

Jasper refused to let anyone tell me why Slash’s gesture was a big deal, which pissed me off. I know it was his plan; he loves to exercise that tiny modicum of control whenever he can. I pretended that it didn’t bother me until he finally left for afternoon classes, taking everyone with him because X and I were safely ensconced in the dorm room. Now that we’re alone, I can breathe a little more freely.

“Thank fuck they’re gone,” Xerxes says as they lean back on the couch. “I appreciate the care, but I’ve beendyingto get you alone, Kit Kat.”

Really?

“Why?” I ask, tilting my head curiously. “Like… we already did the talking thing, right?”

They smirk, shaking their head and clicking their tongue. “Because, KK, we’re notdonetalking. I got your signals in the doctor’s office. We need to get you stuff to keep the girls in place, mmm?”

Wrinkling my nose, I look at my hands, heat rising on my face. “Yeah. I’m not big or anything but I need some… coverage. Where are we going to get it? How fast can we get a binder to… you know, Hell?”

“In a couple of days. I’ll use the concierge service through my family tailors. Since I have your measurements from the ball outfit, it won’t be a big deal. The uniforms were super easy because of that, right?”

I nod, biting my lower lip. “Can you… get a couple? I seem to be doomed to destroy everything I put on my body. I don’t want to end up in the same position in a week or two.”

X snickers. “You’re a trouble magnet, man. I fully expect to need to monitor this shit for you until you do the big reveal.” They pause for a moment, tapping their fingers on their lips. “Can I ask you a question without upsetting you?”

Doubtful when you start out like that.

“Um, you can try.”

“I know you had to pretend, but why didn’t you just… change up to non-binary or trans once you were here? Why keep up the charade?”

Sighing, I roll my eyes upward as I gather my thoughts. “It felt wrong to claim an identity that wasn’t mine. I mean, I don’t know exactly what my… sexuality is entirely, but… I can’t imagine pretending to be a marginalized identity for personal benefit. White dude isn’t that, you know? No one’s oppressing the thing I’m pretending to be, so it’s not shitty.”

There’s a heavy silence for a few moments, then X makes a soft sound. I worry that I’ve said something wrong, so I bring mygaze to theirs, surprised by the soft expression I see. “You’re a good person, Kat Camponella. I get why you’re doing this the way you are now.”

I shrug, feeling embarrassed by the unexpected praise. “I try to be. It’s hard to know when I’m succeeding because I don’t often let people in. You guys are probably the closest friends I’ve had in…. my whole life.”

Saying that out loud makes me sound incredibly pitiful and I hate it.

To brush that feeling off, I continue, “I know the guys will be hurt once I admit the truth. That’s a consequence I’ll have to accept, but I also know that if I’m discovered, it’s likely I’ll be sent away. Even if I tried to hide under some other identity, whatever you guys think is important about me makes me a target. And if I’m not amongst the caliphate, my survival chances are nil. I don’t know exactly what I am or how to control myself—magically or emotionally—well enough to continually fend off shit on my own.”