Page 54 of It Happened Again

He complied, grabbing my glass."So what next?" he asked.

I looked up at him. “I don’t know. She said if I loved her, I’d let her go. And I did. I walked away.”

“Again,” Archer said.

“Again,” I echoed.

A heavy, pitiful pause landed.

“Like you’re stuck in our own version ofGroundhog Day," he muttered.

“Different year, same heartbreak. I thought for sure this time we’d choose each other.”

“But instead,” Archer said, refilling our glasses, “she chooses the ship. The lab. The ambition. And you choose to walk away.”

“I don’t want to walk away,” I snapped. “But what am I supposed to do? Force her to choose me? Be the guy who gets in the way of everything she’s worked for? That’s not love. That’s control. That's Julian. And I'll be damned if I'm going to be anything like him.”

He raised his glass. “Well, here's to not being Julian.”

“I’ll drink to that. The fucker."

"Yeah, fuck Julian."

The tequila went down easier this time. Or maybe I was just numb enough now.

"Let me tell you something, Arch. You are the best brother a guy could ever want."

Archer scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Speak of... maybe we should call Tucker. He’s the only one of us who managed to marry and have kids. Surely he must have some answers.”

“Good idea,” I said, pulling out my phone.

"Ten bucks says he doesn't answer," Archer muttered.

A moment later, I had Tucker on FaceTime, bleary-eyed and naked, at least from the chest up.

"You owe me ten," I whispered to Archer.

“This better be good,” Tucker grumbled. “Do you know what time it is?”

"Yeah. So why are you answering?" I shot back.

“Because one of the kids woke up and projectile vomited allover his bed and needed it changed," he explained. Arch and I winced. "How's your life going?"

"Brooks is in crisis,” Archer said cheerfully, coming to sit by me so we'd both be in the frame. “We need your wisdom, oh Bellamy-god-of-marriage and all things to do with relationships.”

“God help us all,” Tucker muttered, and propped the phone against something. We could hear kids noises in the background. “Talk to me. What's going on?”

I gave him the rundown, and when I was done, Tucker exhaled hard.

“You found yourself stuck in a loop, and you're scared this will keep happening over and over again," he summed up.

“Exactly," I confirmed.

“The only way out is if you’re both ready to break the pattern. See the key is to figure out what matters more than being right, or being first, or being in control.”

“Then what, Mr. Happily Ever After?” Archer snickered.

Tucker smiled, soft and tired. “You don’t marry the perfect woman, only the one who makes you want to be better. But it takes hard work to be better.”

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