Page 73 of Kandie Shoppe

“I know.” Shifting uncomfortably, her eyes dart up at me with a small glimmer of hope. “At least I thought I did. I kept replaying it in my head, but I told myself not to make excuses for you. I hated myself for being an apologist for you. I hated myself so bad.” Swallowing hard she reaches for me. Soft flesh covering my hands is like a balm. She squeezes as she whispers, “I’m sorry, U.”

“No.” I shake my head. “I should’ve told you.” I don’t add I should have trusted her. I couldn’t because she runs her mouth too much. Not on purpose but still.

“I don’t know about that,” she huffs, scrunching her nose. “So the kids are all settled?” she asks, brown eyes beseeching.

“Umhm. All reunited with family or in a safe home.” LL, Angel, and I called in every favor owed and I was able to put my inheritance to use for some good for once. Maybe the first time ever a Shelby did anything without profit in mind.

The relief has her shoulders slumping with relief. I notice for the first time she’s smaller than she was before she ran from me.

“You haven’t been eating enough.” She pauses mid-sigh and looks down at her slightly slighter form.

“I couldn’t bake like I wanted to. Not that Ember-Jane didn’t have the supplies, or the kitchen wasn’t big enough. Maxim has a big sweet tooth, but it has a negative effect on him, so I had to regulate my sugar for mostly paying customers.

“Yeah, that’s quite a network you have.” Not being able to take my eyes off her, I just drink her up, allowing my eyes to touch every part of her I’ve been denied these last months.

“Ahem,” I clear my throat, not sure where this next ask will take us. Back to square one or a full-on blowup like before. “Angel needs Easy,” I tell her. Us having our women flee us at thesame time did something none of our illegal dealing did — drew us together. Misery will do that.

“Figures.” Crossing her arms over her still ample breast, she gives me a skeptical look. “I can handle you, but Angel knows he’s too much for Ezekiel-Jane. She’s good. Never done anything in her whole life but be good. She doesn’t deserve to have Angel ruining her life with all his no-good ways.”

I don’t like how she’s saying she’s not good.

“What the fuck do you mean, you’re not good?” I growl, stepping into her space.

“I didn’t say I wasn’t good.” Huffing, she shrugs in a defensive way.

“You implied it.” Taking her chin, I tilt her face up to look at me. “You’re not good, Kandie.” I shake my head. “You are so much more than that. You are the girl who didn’t want to leave other kids being harmed, even when it cost you everything. You’d already lost so much and you did it again. You were willing to leave your business you work so hard for those kids. If we were dirty, we could have killed you — hell, you thought we were, and you still fought for those kids. You’re not good. You’re a gotdamn goddess and I’m in awe of you.”

“My goodness.” The words are of wonder. And I can’t believe she’s thought of herself as less. Glassy eyes reach mine. There is hope there still and something else — a newfound pride.

“I know I can’t be the only one who told you that. Your family?—”

“They’re my family.” She shrugs one shoulder.

“Everybody ain’t telling the same lie.” I smirk down at her, using Mama-Pete’s words on her.

“No, they aren’t.” Her smile is like sunshine sparkling after a thunderstorm.

Chapter

Twenty-Two

Kandie

“You can call her in a bit,”Rocco tells me over the line. “Use FaceTime so she’ll know you aren’t being coerced.”

After he hangs up, I pace the small expanse of my bakery, tensing, making my shoulders so tight I feel a pinch of pain. As much as I try not to blame myself for being wrong as hell, I can’t help the guilt eating me up likeDevil Lye. I almost feel the queasiness that proceeds retching, but I push it down. The best thing to do is get it over with and hope Ezekiel-Jane doesn’t hate me.

My words at her and Saban leaving play over and over in my mind. “I can’t y’all I’m sorry. Nikki can’t have me bailing on her now. She’s just graduated and I promised to keep that turtle, even if I don’t really have a yard. She’s just got around to trusting us enough. I’m all she has left.”The turtle that is even now at the Honey Love Farm. Ms. Berniece Sanders is good company, even though she eats way more than I thought a turtle could, but she’s a giant one.

We hugged, and they got on the private plane Krie snuck from under her husband’s nose. I took my chances with Ulysses and Angel, but still was mostly no contact with my family because we didn’t want to give up my location. My heart was crushed for months and I threw myself into making Wildcat Kandie liquor rather than to allow myself to sink any lower when it came to the man I gave myself to.

I dial the number that Rocco gave me, waiting long minutes before her beautiful cherubic face fills the screen.

“Kandie?” I hear her ask, pressing the button and bending to look at the screen.

“Hey, girlie,” I chime happily, the bakery quiet behind me in the early afternoon light. My anxiety seemed to flee the moment I saw my cousin. She’s glowing. Western Cape seems to agree with her.

“One second,” she tells me. I hear the muffled fuss of a baby.

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