Page 19 of Under Control

Taking a long, deep breath in the bathroom, she looked around. She realized Carrick had left things out for her—toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo and soap. And it wasn’t the shitty motel stuff. He’d actually thoughtfully laid out necessities. As she whipped on the hottest water and stepped into the tub, she acknowledged that this was a man who was genuinely working to take care of her.

Trying to keep me safe.

The feeling was strange, and it was the only thing that had stopped her from making an effort to squeeze out of the bathroom window and bolt.

As she washed herself, she had a random thought that caused her to raise an eyebrow.Maybe I’m looking at this situation all wrong, she thought, as she rinsed her body in the hot water. Carrick clearly had excellent tactical, outdoorsman and survival skills—things she needed if she ever wanted her big plan to work. Danica flipped off the water, and grabbed a crisp white towel from the rack.

I could ask him to teach me?

Danica nodded to herself, realizing what a genius idea she’d just had. Once she’d learned enough from him, she could finally leave—reclaiming her life on her own, once and for all. That was something she’d wanted for a long, long time. She’d known friends who had reclaimed their lives by turning camping into a lifestyle, and she was just as happy to get lost in the Northern California forests—spending winters in a cabin in the woods while she climbed mountains and summers in a tent on the beach while she surfed the cool, salty water of the coast. Her deep connection to the natural world would heal her and put her broken spirit back together.

A smile crept over her lips—a wild, crazy kind of smile. Maybe the anxiety had finally spiraled to a point of insanity and she had grown just desperate enough. Whatever it was, Carrick was starting to look like an opportunity, not a curse.

As she got out of the shower, she could barely see because of the steam in the bathroom, and there was no working fan. She moved to open the small motel window there, but the damn thing was firmly shut. While she was heaving on it, pushing it hard, she slipped on the wet tile and lost her grip. It didn’t help that little sleep and low blood sugar had clouded her mind and weakened her.

As her feet slipped out from underneath her, she yelped, and the bathroom door whipped open. Carrick lunged forward, grabbing her arms as she almost cracked her head on the wall. Lifting her to her feet, he smoothed his hands over and over her face, running his gaze up and down, likely to check that she was okay.

“You said you weren’t going to run.” He spoke in a low, warning tone, continuing to hold her face in his hands.

“I was just trying to open the window for air,” she explained, but she didn’t step back from his grasp.

As he held her jaw, he stared into her eyes. The towel had fallen off her body, and even through the steam, she had no doubt that he could see her naked form if he looked, but his gaze didn’t drift down.

“You slipped because you are faint.”

She said nothing, just blinked back up at him. Something in his eyes changed in that instant—and there was a flash of emotion. It was the opposite of what she’d seen of him before—collected, emotionless, cool. Something wild and passionate had flashed across his face as he’d looked at her.

“You aren’t taking care of yourself.”

“Yes, I am.” Her words came out more defensive than she’d intended.

“I can’t sit back and let all this bullshit happen.” He let out, his head dropping lower to hers. “Youhaveto talk to me. Give me something to go on.”

Danica felt a heat rising in her chest, a deep stirring of emotion. She tilted her mouth up to his, drinking him in. He was very, very close and wasn’t moving back. He ran his thick, coarse hand down her back, sending goosebumps up her spine as she arched toward him. Her lips parted, which he clearly noticed.

“Carrick, we can’t,” she whispered.

He only frowned in response and tightened his grip on her. It seemed as though his big hands took up half of her back.

“Goddamn it, just fucking talk to me,” he gnashed through a flexed jaw. “I can’t fucking protect you if I don’t know what the hell is going on here.”

Danica’s mouth dropped open. Why hadn’t she seen it before? Never before had a man fought so diligently tohearher, and it threw her off completely, clawing at the defenses she had worked so, so hard on.

Cautiously, she ran her hand up his arm, feeling the definition of his muscles. When she drew her hand down again, he winced in response and pressed his eyes shut momentarily. Danica instantly glanced down at his left forearm where she’d touched, realizing he had a large bandage underneath his shirt. The vision of Carrick violently defending her against the mountain lion flashed to her mind. He could have been killed.

And now he’s hurt.

“I can look at that for you,” she offered, leaning in to look at the bandage.

“No,” he scowled, pulling back.

Frustration built inside her, and she narrowed her eyes at him. She realized he wasn’t the type of man to accept help, but he would probably always offer it.

Danica couldn’t explain why, but in that instant, tears filled her eyes. Maybe she was just overwhelmed by what had happened between them. Maybe she’d just reached the end of her rope with him. It was hard to admit it, but the man had awakened something inside her. And now, here before her, he was focused on her, every inch of her, making her feel something she’d never felt before.

She took in a deep breath, trying to collect herself.

He risked his life for me.

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