Page 38 of Baked

Haze entered the room, wearing a cropped shirt and sweatpants. Our eyes met as he looked at me, concerned. “Indi?”

“He’s dead, Haze!” I sobbed. “He’s fucking dead!”

He sat next to me on the couch, taking my bowl of cereal as I immediately curled into him. I bawled like a baby, soakinghis shirt with my tears. He rubbed my back and held me close, comforting me. The news continued to play as the reporters repeated the same information over and over. Haze’s muscles tightened as he held me close. “It’s okay,” he whispered as he kissed my head. “Everything is going to be okay.”

“How?” I pulled back. “Someone killed Carter! What—what if they try to kill me too?”

Haze tilted his head and digested my words. “Why would they kill you?”

Because my stalker killed him for me. And now he wanted me.

I wiped my tears. “Because—because I was his girlfriend. What if…” I couldn’t form the words. But I knew deep down, something was wrong and it scared the shit out of me.

“Indi, whoever killed Carter probably did it for something completely unrelated to you. He probably had some gambling debts or screwed over some drug dealer. They’re not going to come after you.”

“How do you know?” I asked.

Haze’s face darkened. “Because I just do. And even if they did, you know I would doanythingto protect you.” I stopped crying and looked at my brother. Maybe he was right. Maybe this masked follower was just fucking with me and Carter’s death really was unrelated. But one fact alone didn’t sit well with me. My stalker was in Carter’s home…in his closet. Which means he’d been there before. And if he knew how to get into Carter’s house before, who was to say he couldn’t do it again.

“I need a drink.” I pulled away from Haze and searched the kitchen. I found an old bottle of vodka and began to drink straight from it. It burned my throat, but I didn’t care. I needed to drown my fucking feelings and forget everything. I needed an escape.

Haze stood and walked towards me. “Indi.” He tried to take the bottle away from me, but I dodged him. “Give it to me, Indi. You don’t need to do this.”

I tilted my head and took another swig. “Yes, I do.” He watched me intently. “My mind is so fucking tangled and messed up! There’s so much eating away at me, gnawing at my fucking soul. I fucking need this, Haze. I need to silence these—these sick and dark demons. I need to stop feeling everything all the time and I need to think that everything is going to be okay! Even if it is pretend!” Tears flowed down my face as I stared at him, choking back my cries. “I need to feel nothing.” He clenched his jaw and walked away from me. I took another sip and coughed on the bitter aftertaste.

Haze returned a minute later and held his hand out. In it was one of his joints. I looked up at him and he was smiling. “If you want to feel nothing, then this is what you need. Not a bottle of cheap ass vodka.” He took the glass bottle from my hand and raised the joint to my lips. I held it in my mouth as he lit his own and leaned forward. His green eyes bore into mine, staring so deep into my being as the tip of his joint burned and reflected in his irises. He pressed the end of his joint to mine, lighting it.

I took a large breath and realized it was the one I had smoked that night at the club. “Laced?” I asked with an exhaled cough. Haze grinned and nodded, smoking his own. “Good. But I’m still going to finish this.” I snatched the vodka bottle back.

Haze shrugged and moved past me to pull a second and third bottle out of vodka and whiskey. His joint burned between his lips as he grinned and walked towards the couch. “You coming?” I tried not to laugh, wiping my tears as I followed him with the first bottle. He sat on one end of the couch and took a large drink of the whiskey. I sat opposite him and downed some more vodka. We looked at one another, feeling the effects of his special weed settling in as we drank.

“You’re such a bad influence,” I teased him and laughed as I smoked some more.

Haze eyed me closely as his smile grew. “If only you knew.”

The day had melted awayand blurred together. Haze and I got completely wasted and high as fuck, stumbling around as we danced and joked. It was nice to let loose and just be with my brother. I felt safe. And right now, that was exactly what I needed.

“Okay, my turn!” I stumbled to the armchair and stood in the seat of it still wearing my pajamas. I tossed my hair back and made a ridiculous pose.

Haze busted out laughing as he choked on his weed, smoke shooting from his mouth and nostrils. “What the fuck is that?” he asked, placing the bong down.

I nearly fell over and snorted, fixing my pose. “Oh come on!” I repositioned myself, trying not to fall over as I stood on one leg. I flapped my arms like a bird, laughing as I tried to remain still. “Take a wild guess.”

“Indi.” Haze shook his head. “What the fuck are you doing?”

I placed my hands on my hips with a smile. “You have to guess! I can’t tell you, that’d be cheating! Now, think pink!”

He laughed as he finished off the second vodka bottle. “Pink…fuck okay. Pig?”

“Pig?” I shouted. “I’m sorry, but since when do pigs fly!” I flapped my arms again. “Try again?” I wobbled.

Haze took another hit from the bong as someone knocked on the apartment door. His smile dropped. He looked from me tothe door and stood up. “Fuck, I don’t know. Parrot?” He pointed to me.

“Close!” I snapped my fingers.

Haze shook his head and answered the door. The TV was blaring, but I could hear him speaking with someone. “Is it the neighbors coming to complain again? I told you to tell them to fuck off—” Mary-Jane suddenly entered the living room. “Oh, hey!” I waved at her.

She waved back, looking at me all weird. Her hair seemed extra vibrant and swirled like flames, but maybe that was the drugs and alcohol talking. I remained still in my pose. “What’re you doing?” she asked, looking around the living room at our mess.

---