Page 108 of Her Cruel Redemption

When it clicked, I stopped pacing, my breath releasing in a softoh. Memory flashed through my mind, of a swaying bridge in a storm, of lightning tearing from my palm, hitting Draven square in the chest as he tried to get me to stop. It was possible becauseI’d struck him.

But if I’d damaged him the way I’d damaged Goras when I did…. those days in the cave… My hands moved to my hair as the thread on my final excuse snapped. If he’d lost his magic when I’d struck him, then he can’t have been using it to manipulate me in the cave. Then that impossible draw I felt to him, all those emotions, all the tears and longing, had just been… me. I swore, unwilling to believe it. Could I stand before him now and know once and for all if what I’d felt for him was real or simply enchantment? Would knowing that cure me of the clawing, caustic terror burning up my throat at the thought of his execution?

I pulled my hands from my hair as a decision formed. Nothing Draven had done justified that creature Lidello getting anywhere near him. I rubbed my thumbs along my fingertips, aching to give in to the fizz of magic. Just one little rush of sparks to remind myself that I was powerful. But already the walls were shifting, wavering in a haze, the floral wallpaper morphing into dozens of screaming faces, and I hadn’t even released the magic, only stoked it a little. I had to refrain, had to control the urge. I didn’t need it, I could still scare Lidello with the threat of it. Just because they all wanted to shut down my political influence didn’t mean I wasn’t fucking terrifying. I would make it clear that he needed to stay away from Draven or he would answer to me.

As I crossed back to the door, I paused by the dresser, where Leela had strung my belt of throwing knives up. It wouldn’t hurt to have another weapon at my disposal to bolster my threat. I strapped it on, then wrenched open the door. The guard jolted, clearly not expecting me to reemerge so soon, and then he was trotting after me.

I had to take a breath, consciously slowing my pace, because I had no idea where I was going. Saltarre Castle was huge, and gloomy, all stone blocks and guttering sconces everywhere. Where would I even start? When the guard caught up to me, I spoke without looking in his direction.

‘You must hate this assignment,’ I said lightly. ‘Babysitting me while I’m sure your friends are all celebrating their victory.’

He said nothing, but I felt a shift in the atmosphere between us. He seemed uncertain. Wary.

‘I suppose it makes sense,’ I continued. ‘It wouldn’t do to have me wandering about, listening at doors. That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? To make sure I behave? Seems a poor repayment for my service to your king. We would never have taken Port Howl without me.’ I shifted my glance sideways to him. He was young. Round-faced and scruffy. His fingers twitch toward the hilt of his sword, but it was just nerves, not aggression. ‘Did you see the harbour go up in flames?’

‘Only the aftermath,’ he said, relaxing a little. ‘I was at the gate. I saw their retreat when they realised what was happening, though. Shocked them good I reckon.’

‘It really did,’ I said with a frivolous laugh. Then I sighed dramatically. ‘It took quite a lot out of me, though, working that kind of magic. So many trips to the healer and still I feel just awful.’ I touched my fingers to my head, biting my lip. ‘I was thinking that perhaps Arch Magister Lidello could help me. Do you know where I’d find him?’

He gave me a sidelong look. ‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea.’

A flash of irritation I barely leashed. It rubbed up against my sense of urgency, my panic, the feeling I had of time trickling away to a horrific finale. ‘Why not?’ I replied, trying to maintain my pleasant tone.

‘I don’t think he likes being disturbed.’

‘Neither do I, but here we are,’ I replied with a smile. He hesitated, shifting on his feet. I could feel him weighing his orders to watch me and keep me out of trouble against the ease of simply letting me do as I pleased. He wasn’t stupid, but he was young. Young men were easy to steer when you knew which way to push. ‘Do you think you could help me find him? I won’t need long. And then I’ll lock myself up in my room for the rest of the day and you’ll have nothing else to worry about.’

He studied me for a moment, then exhaled loudly through his nose. ‘Alright. But if he refuses to see you, we have to leave.’

‘Of course.’

He led me up a stairwell to one of the upper floors, and to a heavy wooden door. ‘In there. Just make it quick.’

‘Thank you for your help,’ I said, allowing a sharp note or sarcasm to creep into my tone before I pulled open the door and stepped into the dim room beyond. The guard opened his mouth—surely to insist that I knock first—but I was already closing the door behind me.

The room beyond was dimly lit, the daylight blotted out by heavy curtains across the windows. A heavy wooden desk stood against one wall, covered in neat stacks of parchment, each one meticulously arranged. A single candle burned low, casting flickering shadows that crawled up the stone walls. A door stood ajar, revealing what looked like a bedroom beyond, and through it a figure emerged, dusting his hands together as he took me in. A smile spread across his face like a pool of spilt ink.

‘What a surprise,’ he said in that soft, rustling voice that made my skin crawl. ‘To what do I owe the pleasure?’

‘Draven’s been captured, hasn’t he?’ All the feigned amicability I’d donned for the guard dropped from me like a sheet.

Lidello's smile widened, a slow, deliberate thing, as if he were savouring the moment. He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he moved to his desk, fingers brushing over the parchment as though the papers were of far greater interest than my presence.

‘Straight to the point,’ he mused. ‘Interesting.’

I took a step closer, my pulse hammering against my ribs. ‘Is it true?’

He sighed, shaking his head. ‘You already know the answer. Why ask?’

I clenched my fists, nails biting into my palms. The room was too small, too stifling, thick with the scent of melted wax and something metallic. ‘Has he really lost his magic?’

His hands still and he turned, brow arched in question as he studied me. Then, he snorted. ‘If you’ve been paying attention, then you’ll already know that too. Isn’t it strange that you wield magic that has the capability of destroying someone else’s? What does it make you feel, knowing you’re the one who took it from him?’

‘Where is he?’ The words left my mouth before I could stop them. It was the wrong question. The one I wasn’t supposed to ask. That wasnotwhy I’d come. I wasn’t going tofind him.

I took another step closer with a purpose I couldn’t entirely understand. It was as though my body was acting before my mind could stop it.

His eyes flicked over me, noting the shift. ‘Quite wound up, I see.’ His smile became darker, a provocation, a taunt. ‘He isn’t. He seems completely empty. All that rage just washed away. It’s almost disappointing. He tells me he has nothing left to break, but I’m sure I can find something if I dig deep enough.’

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