Page 85 of Dream a Little Dream

“Me and Heather.”

Jack went quiet for a moment. Then, “You haven’t told her, have you?” No question. A statement. Of fact.

Kenny didn’t look at him, choosing to admire the sprawling field they drove past instead.

“Kenny?”

“No, Jack, I haven’t told her I used to fuck the Detective Inspector of Ryston Police.”

Jack tightened his hands on the wheel and Kenny felt instantly guilty. The snap came from his unease. He was keeping too much in. Not just from Jack. But from Heather. It was like he hadn’t learned. Strangely, the only person he was being fully honest with right then was Aaron.

Except for this, that was.

“I meant that you’re bi,” Jack said.

Kenny said nothing.

“Jesus, Kenny. You lecture me about being honest with Fraser, yet you’re the biggest fucking hypocrite.”

“I’m not engaged to Heather.” Feeble response. Really downright feeble.

“Why wouldn’t you tell her?”

“WhyshouldI tell her? It has no bearing on us right now.”

“It’s a big fucking part of you. You’re hiding it. That’s not fair. To her. To you.”

“And when I think it’s justified to let her know that part, I will.”

“How about when your ex-boyfriend’s fiancé wants to go on a double date so he can dig up all the dirt on your old relationship?”

“And how does that makeyoufeel?”

Jack looked at him. Glared at him. Jaw clenched. Then he breathed out a laugh. “Fuck you.” He slammed his head back on the headrest. “Can’t believe I still get riled up by you. IloveFraser.”

“I know you do. But you have unfinished business with me you can’t shake. And it’ll eat at you until you let Fraser know what it is I gave you that he isn’t. Then let him have the chance to step into that role, eliminating me altogether.”

Jack went quiet. Then, “I hate you sometimes.”

“I know. It’s warranted.” Kenny glanced back out of the window. “And, just for the record, just so you know, just once, I care deeply about you and hate myself for what happened.” He peered back to test the water. To see if Jack was ready to hear the rest. He was. “But for me, we’re over. I failed at being your boyfriend and I have no intention of trying again. And I will happily tell your fiancé that, so he doesn’t feel like he has to muscle in down the station with the pretence of handing out cupcakes, just so he can give me a death glare. Nor does he need to keep tabs on me by trying to create some fake friendship group.”

“Is there anyone you don’t psychoanalyse?”

Kenny snorted. “Myself.”

“Ain’t that the truth?” Jack waited a beat, then, soft, barely audible, he said, “I care about you, too.”

Kenny smiled, but his stomach twisted in knots. What would Jack say if he knew the danger Kenny was putting himself in? The risks he was taking? How he was, once again, becomingobsessed? But this time with a person. Aman. One twenty years his junior and would rip out his heart and soul if given the chance.

Kennycouldn’tgive Aaron that chance.

So he kept all that to himself and he and Jack merged into a semi-comfortable silence reminiscent of their days together chasing leads, sailing onto the motorway, with Kenny putting together his plans for what lay at the end of this drive.

“By the way,” Jack said after a few more miles between them and Ryston. “I should tell you…We’ll be picking up Aaron Jones today.”

Kenny shot back to face him. “What?Why?”

“For questioning. We got access to Rahul’s phone. Guess who contacted him the week leading to his death? Asked him to meet him by the river?”

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