Page 33 of Killing Me Softly

“Mmm hmm.”

“I’m staying there though. Have viewings for new house mates for final year coming up.”

“Uh-huh.”

“If it’s a mess, Max and George won’t get their deposit back.”

“Better check all their cubby holes for loose drugs or unconscious bodies then.”

The words fell out before he could stop them. A dig he couldn’t resist, even if it was unnecessary. Maybe the whole thing was water under the bridge now. They’d talked it through, and Taylor had kept Aaron’s secret, knowing who he was. And maybe his selfish act had been the catalyst that pushed him back toward Kenny. But it didn’t matter. The wound was still raw, the memory a thorn he couldn’t pluck free. Things could’ve been different if Taylor hadn’t been so desperate to prove how big his dick was. If he hadn’t let his housemates drug him. If he hadn’t been so willing to sacrifice Aaron’s trust for a quick and selfish thrill, they might have been friends. The betrayal still clung to him like a stain he couldn’t scrub clean, no matter how much time had passed. Nor with any of the products currently in Taylor’s basket and burning a hole through the note in Aaron’s hand.

“We learnt our lesson,” Taylor said.

Aaron said nothing.

Taylor snorted, obviously picking up on Aaron’s lack of a response

“How’s things with you?” Although not enough to actually stop speaking.

“Fine. Same as.”

“You look tanned. You been away?”

“Barcelona.”

“Nice. Who’d you go with?”

Aaron waited a moment, then thought he had to give Taylor something. He’d find out through Mel, anyway. “Bloke I’m seeing.”

“Right. Yeah.” Taylor stepped back. “Course.” He bowed his head. “Was good to see you. You look…good.” He went to walk away and Aaron had a sudden pang of guilt. Or not so much guilt, but a realisation he needed someone who was vaguely normal to ask for some advice.

“Taylor?”

Taylor turned back. “Yeah?”

“If your mum had died when we were…y’know?”

“Sleeping together?”

“Yeah. What would you want from me?”

Taylor furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?”

“You know I’m not good at…relationship shit. So if your mum had died unexpectedly, what is it you’d want me to do to make you feel better? Or show that I care.”

“Doyou care?”

“Yes.”

“New bloke got more than I did, then.”

Aaron exhaled. “Forget it.” He turned back to the note, scanning the items. Bleach. Polish. Leather wipes. Who knew there were wipes especially for leather? And as Kenny’s sofa was fabric, Aaron wandered what Kenny had in the way of leather that needed wiping clean…

“I’d want to know you were there if I needed you.” Taylor’s voice sailed over Aaron’s musings of whether there was more to Kenny’s sex kinks than he knew of.

“How do I show that?”

“You couldsayit.”

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