Page 54 of Killing Me Softly

“Do what?”

“Get Kenny out of his own head. Bring him back to you. Don’t let him drown in all this. Trust me, I’ve been there. Learn frommymistakes.” Jack tilted his neck, the pain of their history still there but not quite as biting as maybe it used to be. “Keep him with you. Whatever it takes.”

Aaron didn’t move.Couldn’tmove. Jack’s words, heavy and suffocating, felt as if he’d punched the air from his lungs.

“I don’t know how to do that.” Aaron picked at his nails, the realisation of how inept he was at all this. “I don’t even know how to be…normalwith him.”

“What’s normal? There’s no blueprint for relationships. They’re all different. Unique. And yours and Kenny’s is how it’s meant to be for you and Kenny.”

“Messy?”

Jack snorted. “Yeah. Messy. Look, Kenny’s love? It’s not easy. It’s intense, and it’s tangled up in all the shit he’s been through. I’m no psychologist, but I’d bet it all ties back to Jessica. Losing her, and feeling responsible for that? It’s like he’s spent his whole life trying to make up for something that wasn’t even his fault. That’s whathecarries.”

Aaron swallowed hard, the words hitting a nerve he didn’t want to acknowledge.

“You need to be mindful of that. Because when Kenny loves, he loves all the way. It’s not subtle or quiet. It’s overwhelming. And a little terrifying. But it’s real. And I’m guessing you alreadyknow that. You must have seen it. That way he looks at you sometimes. When you’re doing something completely mundane, but he’s gazing at you as if it’s the most enchanting thing he’s ever laid eyes on. And then there are those other times. Theintenseones. When he stares at you like you’re going to break apart, and he refuses to let you.”

The memories rushed back to Aaron unbidden. Those quiet moments when he’d caught Kenny watching him from across the room, his gaze soft and achingly full of something Aaron couldn’t quite name. And those other moments—the ones that stole his breath—when Kenny was inside him, holding him still, hands firm, eyes locked on Aaron’s as though he was trying to read his mind. Trying to say everything he couldn’t with words.

But despite it all, despite knowing what was behind those eyes now, Aaron shrank into himself. “Did he look at you like that, then?”

Jack inhaled sharply. “A long time ago.”

Aaron chewed his lip, nodding. He knew it was irrational—the jealousy curling in his gut, twisting at the idea that once,once, Kenny’s eyes had burned for someone else. That someone else had been on the receiving end of those stolen glances, those silent confessions. But then Jack let out a slow breath and placed a hand on Aaron’s shoulder.

“But I couldn’tkeephis gaze on me. It always wandered somewhere else. Tosomeoneelse.” He tightened his grip on Aaron’s shoulder, not in warning, but as if in reluctant understanding. “So here’s a little advice.Keephim looking at you. Cause it’s all there in those eyes. His obsession with you. His utter fucking devotion. It’s yours to keep if you want it. If you can handle it.”

Aaron met Jack’s gaze. Could he handle it? The full weight of Kenny’s love, his devotion, hisneed? Could he hold that gaze and never let it slip away?

Yeah. Yeah, he fucking could.

Because if Kenny could handle all ofhim—his jagged edges, his outbursts, hismess—then Aaron would do whatever it took to make sure Kenny never had a reason to look anywhere else ever again.

So he stood. And without a word, he bolted, pounding over the grass mound, skidding into the passenger side of Mel’s car and yanked the door open. He threw himself inside. “Back to campus. Now!”

Mel raised an eyebrow but didn’t say a word. The urgency radiating off him was enough to keep her quiet. The drive back was tense, the silence heavy, broken only by the hum of the engine. She hadn’t even fully parked in her spot before Aaron was out, slamming the door behind him, slinging his bag over one shoulder.

He sprinted across campus, weaving through students to the Psychology building, where he barrelled through the doors, feet barely hitting the ground as he launched up the stairs two at a time. By the time he reached the faculty office, his chest burned.

Kenny’s office door was open, and Aaron slalomed through the administration desks, passed the startled staff, focus locked on that doorway.

“Excuse me!” The faculty secretary shot up from her desk.

Aarondidn’texcuse her, and he launched into Kenny’s office, gripping the doorframe as his momentum carried him forward, jabbing his thumb behind him at the admin woman. “Tell her to fuck the fuck off!”

Kenny snapped up in surprise, glasses perched on his nose, brow furrowed, fingers hovering over the keyboard on his laptop. He shot to his feet. “It’s fine, Gail.” He kept his voice calm despite the commotion. “I’ve got this.”

Gail stopped her march, glared at Aaron, before retreating with a huff. Kenny stepped around the desk, eyes on Aaron asthough approaching a live wire, then reached behind him to close the door. “You all right?”

Aaron didn’t answer. He dropped his bag on the floor, yanked shut the blinds on the window, and his heart thumped unbearably as he raked his fingers through Kenny’s beard, then tugged him down for a mouthwatering kiss.

Kenny stumbled back, hitting the edge of his desk, and Aaron followed, pushing forward between his legs. After a moment, Kenny dragged his hands around Aaron’s waist, stroking up into his T-shirt and along the base of his spine, grasping his body to his. Aaron hummed, tangling his fingers in Kenny’s hair, lips insistent.Tongues brushing. Heated. Languid.Dangerous.

But oh, so fuckinggood.

Aaron pulled away, and Kenny dipped his forehead on his. There, they just stared at each other.Heldeach other. For a really long time.

Not needing words.

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