Page 63 of Killing Me Softly

The idea lingered, heavy and unrelenting, lodging itself in his chest and forming a lump in his throat. It was too soon. Yet it didn’t feel soonenough. As if it was inevitable. And everything Aaron had said earlier made him realise there were two of them in this. Not just him. But there was still so much between them. So much to resolve. So he shook the thought off along with the droplets from his hair, and after pulling on a pair of loose joggers and an old sweatshirt, he padded barefoot to his office. His laptop sat there on the desk, open and waiting. It was a trap. A gaping rabbit’s hole beckoning him to fall back into the darkness.

He slammed it shut.

Then pulled open the top drawer, retrieving the carefully wrapped gift he’d tucked away days ago. Pre Barcelona. Hisheart raced as he held it, the meaning behind it. Clutching the package in his hand, he headed downstairs, bare feet tripping on the scattered clothes littering the hallway. He ignored them to step into the living room, where Aaron glanced up from the couch, face softening into a smile that made Kenny’s chest flutter.

“Guess this is where we talk, huh?”

“In a minute.” Kenny crossed the room, the gift tucked behind his back as he sank onto the coffee table in front of him. His knees brushed Aaron’s, and he sat there for a moment, holding his breath, willing himself to speak. Finally, he brought the gift forward, holding it out with both hands. “Happy birthday.”

“You… you got me something?”

“Of course I did. Shouldn’t I have?”

Aaron took the package. “I don’t know. The only thing I got you for your birthday was a Crème Egg and a blowjob.”

“Best damn gift I’ve ever had.”

Aaron turned the present over in his hands, brow furrowing as though he wasn’t sure what to do with it.

“You can open it.” Kenny nodded to the package.

“Give me a minute.” Aaron looked up with an intensity that made Kenny still. “This is the first birthday present I’ve had in… a really long time.”

“It won’t be the last.”

Aaron’s lips curved into a faint smile, the kind that lit his entire face, and he took another steadying breath before tearing the paper. Tossing the wrapping aside, he ran his fingers over the smooth leather casing and Kenny could feel that touch as if it was on his skin. Cautiously, Aaron opened the box, the lid clicking back to reveal the vintage silver watch nestled inside. Aaron plucked it from its foam cushion, turning it over in hishands, ghosting his thumb over the engraving on the back, and his voice faltered as he read aloud,“This is your time.”

Kenny felt the need to explain. “The past is the past. Leave it there. You, Aaron Jones, have all the time in the world to become everything you’re meant to be.”

“Yeah? And what’s that?”

“Just you.”

Aaron’s eyes glistened, caught somewhere between a laugh and a sob. Then he launched forward, wrapping his arms around Kenny and held him. Kenny shifted, manoeuvring Aaron onto his lap, and as Aaron pressed against him, Kenny took the watch and strapped it onto his wrist, the silver catching the light.

“You know you’re killing me here.” Aaron nuzzled into Kenny’s neck.

“With affection, I hope.”

Aaron pulled back. “I’m sorry about what happened to your mum.”

Kenny nodded, lowering his head. “Who told you?”

“Jack.”

“Of course he did.”

“I made him. Chased him down at the station. I knew you were hiding something.”

Kenny sighed, long and heavy. “For a while, I thought I was losing it. As if my guilt for not being there when she died was feeding this… need to find a reason. A culprit. I didn’t want to accept that I, once again, wasn’t there to stop it from happening.”

“What do you mean ‘once again’?”

Kenny swallowed the lump in his throat. He owed Aaron the truth. To talk about it. “Jessica begged me to walk to the shop with her on the day she was abducted. I refused. Was too busy watchingGladiators.”

“That’s not your fault.”

“Maybe not. But had I gone with her, had I been there…she would be alive right now.”

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