Page 5 of Eleanor & Grey

Shay stood tall in her high heels, and boy, could she wear high heels.

My calves hurt at the thought of even trying them on.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I replied, looking down at my yellow cardigan with dragonflies Mom made me. Beneath it was an old-school Metallica T-shirt that I stole from my dad because it hadn’t fit over his gut since 1988. My favorite ripped blue jeans and yellow Chucks completed the outfit.

My cocoa-colored hair was brushed back in a ponytail, and the closest thing to makeup on my face were lingering microscopic remnants of the bar soap I’d used to wash it that morning. At least my braces were nice and shiny.

I should’ve worn a push-up bra. Not that it would’ve helped any. Push-up bras only really worked if there was something to actually push up.

My handwoven crossbody bag—also made by my mom—was tossed over my shoulder, and I was already counting down the hours until the party would be over.

“It’s pretty much just guys from the basketball team and their friends,” Shay commented, as if that would make a difference in my mind about the party I was about to hate.

“That’s fine.”

“There’s some nice people, though,” she said. “They aren’t all assholes.”

“That sounds promising.”

“Okay, let’s rock this,” Shay said, opening the front door and walking into a house filled with people I wished I didn’t have to see. Seeing my fellow classmates outside of school felt like a cruel form of punishment. I’d seen them enough during the school year, and the last thing I wanted was to be packed in like sardines with them.

My idea of a party was more like watching reruns of Whose Line is it Anyway in pajamas with my parents while eating a stupid amount of popcorn and greasy cheeseburgers. Mom would have a vegan burger, obviously. She’d watched a documentary on the treatment of animals years back and it had changed her for life.

Dad had watched it too, but he still ate his steak medium-rare.

“I’ll find you a Coke,” Shay said.

“Are you drinking?”

She shook her head. “Not since what happened with Landon. I’d rather be sober than drunkenly make out with him again.”

“That’s really smart, but if you did end up drunk, I’d make sure you didn’t kiss the jerk.”

“That’s why you’re my favorite cousin.”

“I’m your only cousin. See if you can find some ice for the Coke, will you? I’ll be in—”

“A corner.” She smirked. “I bet you five bucks I’ll find you in a corner with a book in your hands.”

“It’s like you’ve known me my whole life or something.”

She laughed and hurried away, though, not with ease. Every time Shay walked into a room, everyone clamored for her attention—and she was nice enough to give it to all of them.

I would’ve just kept walking.

It would be a while before I got my drink, but I was lucky enough to score myself a nice nook right under the staircase—a very Harry Potter-ish spot to read.

I tossed on my headphones, not because I was listening to anything, but because people tended to leave you alone if you had headphones on. It was a great introvert hack: look busy to avoid human interaction. Doubling up on two activities was even better.

A book alone isn’t always enough to get people to ignore you, but a book and headphones? Well, you might as well be a ghost.

It was so hard being an introvert in an extrovert world, one where the social norms involved house parties, school clubs, spirit week, and getting together with people didn’t care to see just to say you were “living life to the fullest.”

Society was the worst for introverts, but I was sure a changing of the tides was on the way. I couldn’t wait until the day the media pushed the idea that staying home was the new cool thing to do and socializing with people you hated was a thing of the past. All of us introverts would rejoice!

Quietly…alone…with a good cup of coffee, a solid read, and our faithful cats.

I made myself comfortable on the floor with my legs crossed like a pretzel and rested my back against the wall. The more tucked away I was in my tight corner, the less people would notice me. Carry on, muggles. I’m not even here. I am just a part of the wall.

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