Page 49 of Landon & Shay: Part Two

His body recoiled from those words and he took a step back. “I thought you’d be at work today. You should have told me you were on your way over.”

Oh, all right then.

I understood now.

That was the error of my ways—not informing Sam I was heading to his house. If I had, he could’ve kicked Princess Leia out sooner and been seen as the Prince Charming he was only pretending to be.

Opening doors, calling his nonna, making pies for the underprivileged—good ol’ Sam, the saint of all saints who just so happened to have an undomesticated penis.

I’d have been lying if I’d said the current situation didn’t affect me a small bit. I was a strong woman, but still human after all. Things got to me. Even Sam and his betrayal were affecting my heart—though, I’d admit, a lot less than it should’ve.

Sam grimaced. “Look, Shay, I think you’re a great girl, but—”

“No,” I cut in, shaking my head. “You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to break up with me while you’re shirtless on the street because I caught you cheating. No, I’m breaking up with you, okay? So, take yourself back inside and return to screwing your princess. You two are actually perfect for one another. As far as you and I go? We’re done. So, just to be clear,Ibroke up withyou. Not the other way around. Okay?”

He shrugged. “Okay.”

Okay?

Gosh, why was he so all right with the break-up?

Of course he didn’t fight for me, because we weren’t fireworks in the sky. We were little sparklers that fizzled out with no longevity.

There was no point for me to keep pushing him, to keep making digs at his actions. Truth was, we hardly even knew one another. We weren’t ever going to be anything more than the past nine months. We weren’t going to discover any more firsts.

I wouldn’t meet his mom, and he wouldn’t meet mine.

He wouldn’t celebrate my birthday, and I wouldn’t give him Christmas gifts.

We were just a couple of almosts.

Come on, Shay. Chin up, head high, and walk away. You’ve known your mailman longer than you’ve known this boy. There are canned goods in your pantry older than this relationship. Move on.

I headed toward my car, not feeling too much about the whole situation or about Sam. I wished I could’ve said I was surprised, but life had taught me all about men. It turned out all guys were the same, no matter what. It could be a nerd, a jock, a scientist, or a monk. At the end of the day, they were all alike because they all had dicks.

All a dick could do was dickish things, and us women had to deal with it.

But on the plus side, at least wine still existed.

As I headed to my car to leave, my phone dinged with a message from Eleanor.

Eleanor:Just a heads-up, I think Landon is bringing a woman tonight. Maybe reconsider having mystery man on your arm?

Oh, great.

I was going to skip right over the wine and head straight for the vodka.

* * *

Anyone who thoughteleven A.M. was too early for vodka, probably never tried it. I shouldn’t have cared that Landon was bringing a woman. He could’ve brought every lady on the planet on his arm, and I should’ve been fine with that fact. But truthfully, I wasn’t. After seeing him the other night, wounds that I thought were closed began to reopen again. Then with Sam’s betrayal, I felt even more exposed.

I sat in my apartment, mindlessly swiping left and right on my cell phone like the pathetic woman I had become. For the last year and a half, I’d banned myself from dating apps. After joining them earlier in an attempt to get over Satan, I’d found there was a slippery slope that came with the territory. The level of addiction I had to opening the applications was sickening.

Bumble? Tinder? Coffee Meets Bagel?

Didn’t matter—I was obsessed.

Not only was there the mindless swiping, there was also the whole dramatic phrase of deleting all dating applications from your cell phone, because you were—quote unquote—over it, only to re-download them a week later, because addiction was real, and who knew, maybe PimpDaddy69 was truly my soul mate. Just because he wrote his bio in all caps and spelled princess with two dollar symbols, didn’t mean he wasn’t my knight in $hining armor.

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