Page 109 of Living on the Edge

Angus

The next fewweeks are calm and quiet, as far as life goes.

We’re still rockin’ hard, playing night after night, and Ryleigh is still with me even though Rich isn’t paying her anymore.

The story she pens is beautiful—poignant, interesting, and not always rosy. She’s honest about the breakdown between the band members after my identity was revealed, Jonny’s ongoing struggles in trusting me again, and the bond we share both within the band and with Nobody’s Fool.

She also writes about the magnetism with our fans, and how they’re drawn to the music despite the drama, and how, at the time of the article, we were on the verge of hitting gold—which is when an album sells five hundred thousand copies in the US.

I’m so fucking proud of her, and if that’s not enough to make Rich happy, I’m willing to let my uncle contact his buddy atRolling Stone. Everything is about who you know, so Rich can fuck off. He’s not the only game in town.

I know she’s worried about health insurance, and short-term, I can afford to take care of any bills that come up, but that’s not practical in the long run. Something as simple as emergency gallbladder surgery could cost upwards of a hundred grand. God forbid she winds up with the breast cancer she’s at risk for—that would put a dent even in my hefty bank account.

If we were married, it wouldn’t be a problem.

I know it’s soon to think about that.

It’s crazy to even consider it, but I can’t seem to help myself.

She’s my other half in almost every way. Happy when I’m grumpy, soft when I’m hard, and she uses words to be creative while I use music. We complement each other in ways I’ve never felt before so I have no reason to let her go home.

Unless she wants to.

But I don’t think she does.

I think she’s happy.

We’rehappy.

And it’s fucking great.

She’s been creating content for her social media platforms, and she’s had three other videos go viral to do with the band, so it’s been win-win in that regard. She hasn’t heard anything from Rich, other than a request to review an album, so she isn’t sure what’s going on. He told her he was working on something and would get back to her when the article was ready to be published.

So she’s in a holding pattern there, which is stressful, but I’ve tried to distract her.

I’m still waiting for the results of the paternity test, which I’m having delivered to Sasha’s house since I don’t know exactly how long it’s going to take. I made sure to use a lab that caters to discretion, and it should only be a few more days, but I’m a little nervous about it.

If my father is actually my uncle, and my uncle is really my dad, that’s going to take some getting used to.

I’m upset with my mother but—and I understand there’s a double standard—not at all with my uncle. From what Ryleigh heard, he loves her and wanted to be with her. She’s the one who didn’t want to be with him. And still doesn’t. It makes me wonder—and hope—if maybe Alden isn’t my father’s son either. He’s got a lot of Alex’s quirks, but that’s probably too much to hope for.

I have none of Alex’s quirks and deep down I’m positive Ryleigh didn’t misunderstand what she heard.

It all makes sense.

The roughhousing when I was little.

Teaching me to fish.

Showing up at hockey games, graduations, and lots of other big events.

And I know, even though he doesn’t know I saw him, that he’s attended a handful of my shows. I was cranky about hiding my identity back then, so I pretended I didn’t see him.

Another thing I’m regretting.

But I don’t have time for regrets.

We just found out the album has gone gold so Sasha is flying out to a show this weekend to celebrate with us. I think they’re going to give us framed gold records commemorating the milestone, but I’m not sure. Nobody’s Fool just got theirs last week for going platinum, so there’s been a lot of excitement on the tour.

---