Page 126 of Living on the Edge

I haven’t sleptsince the night Angus visited me at work.

Seeing him again re-opened all the wounds and I’m having a hard time with everything. Again. Everything is so damn raw. As strong as I pretended to be in front of him, now that he’s gone, I’m a mess. Everyone at work has noticed and Josie has taken to coming by at night, hanging out on slow nights just to talk.

I want to move on, to put Angus and Crimson Edge and my disastrous and short journalism career behind me, but it’s easier said than done. It’s like an integral part of me is missing and without it, I’m just a shell of my former self.

And I hate myself for feeling that way.

I never thought I would be one of those women who can’t survive a broken heart.

But this is so much more than that.

The humiliation, the loss of friends like Kirsten and Lexi, and—I have to be hallucinating. I’ve spent so much time thinking about Kirsten and Lexi, I’m starting to see things. Because they can’t possibly be walking into the restaurant on a Wednesday night in the middle of November.

I blink and then do a double take.

Holy shit.

Lexi waves like we just saw each other yesterday and Kirsten comes running over to hug me.

“Hi.” I can’t help but hug her back. “What are you doing here?”

“We have to talk,” she says firmly. “Can you take a break?”

“I…” I look around and motion to a table in the back. “Go sit down and I’ll let my staff know I’m taking ten.”

A few minutes later I join them and one of the waitresses comes over to see if we want anything to eat.

“Two virgin pina coladas please,” Lexi says with a grin.

“And these loaded nachos,” Kirsten adds, looking at the menu. “I’ve been traveling all day—I’m starving.”

“Oh, and the boneless wings,” Lexi adds.

“So, what’s up, guys? You didn’t come all the way to Minneapolis for virgin drinks and nachos.”

They exchange a look and then lean forward. “This is an intervention,” Lexi says.

“Because you and Angus are obviously too stubborn to figure shit out on your own.” Kirsten nods.

“We gave it a little time,” Lexi continues, “but you’re still in hiding and Angus is grumpier than ever. So it’s time to talk this shit out.”

“Angus came to talk to me,” I say softly. “But there’s nothing to work out. I understand that he thought I betrayed him, but he didn’t even give me a chance to explain or to maybe discuss what happened together. He told me he loved me and then, when I needed him most, turned his back on me. I miss him so much I can barely breathe sometimes, but how can I go back to a relationship like that?”

“He’s been in therapy,” Lexi says quietly. “For months now. He’s been working on himself. You have no idea how he felt when the truth came out.”

I don’t say anything because I always knew the truth—Angus just didn’t give me a chance to explain. I didn’t know about Ben, of course, but I could have shown him the email from Rich telling me he “fixed” my article. Or let him listen to the voicemail Rich left me a few days after the article was published, patting himself on the back for doing what he had to do to make me relevant in the world of investigative journalism. There were no details but enough vague information to prove that the article wasn’t entirely written by me.

“Look, I’m really happy to see you guys, but I can’t?—”

“He’s thinking about leaving the band,” Lexi says flatly.

“He’s what?” Kirsten squeaks as my mouth falls open.

“I’m not supposed to know this,” Lexi admits, “but I happened to overhear something I shouldn’t have. And that’s why we’re here.”

“It is?” Kirsten looks indignant. “I thought we were meddling.”

“We are, and I wasn’t going to pull out the big guns unless I had to because I really didn’t want to talk about something I wasn’t supposed to overhear, but it’s obvious the two of you need help getting on the same page.”

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