Page 14 of Living on the Edge

I mentally grimace but don’t say anything, looking for a place we can eat that everyone can afford. We get a per diem but it’s not a lot. I can eat anywhere I want, but they don’t know that, so I have to make a decision as to whether I buy dinner for everyone at a place I want to go to—and I’ve done it many times before—or just suck it up so they don’t get suspicious.

I made it sound like I made good money before I decided to play music full-time, and despite how close we are, they’ve never asked for details.

It’s a cluster fuck, and it’s becoming clear I need to come clean with them.

It’s just hard.

I don’t want them to be pissed off that I lied.

In the beginning I didn’t know them well enough to trust them, and now that I do, I’m the one who betrayed their trust.

“There’s a place that sounds good within walking distance of the hotel,” I say after a moment. “Let’s go there.”

The place is expensive, but I’ll put it on my credit card and tell them they can pay me back whenever. Or buy me drinks after the next show. It won’t come close to covering the cost, but I’ve done it before, and it’s never been an issue.

“Where are we going?” Ryleigh asks as we gather in the hotel lobby.

“It’s called Dominik’s,” I reply absently. “It’s only about two blocks from here.”

“Okay.”

“Meet back here in an hour,” I say.

Everyone disperses, and I freshen up in my room before heading back down. The whole band is there, along with Sam’s girlfriend Kirsten, who’s with us for a few more weeks until she leaves for college, her sister and brother-in-law—Sydney, who’s married to Ford Malone from Nobody’s Fool—and a couple of the road crew.

Everyone except Ryleigh.

“Anyone talk to Ryleigh?” I ask, looking around in annoyance. If she’s one of those women who’s always late, we’re not waiting around for her.

“She’s not coming,” Kirsten says.

“This was her idea,” Mick protests, making a face.

“I don’t think she can afford it,” Kirsten says softly. “I offered to pay for her, but she said no. And I didn’t push it because she seemed embarrassed.”

Dammit.

I wanted to avoid them thinking about the price until we got there. I should have known she would look the place up once she asked me where we were going. The rest of the band wouldn’t think to do that—they’d just wing it when we got there because they trust me.

Ryleigh doesn’t really know me.

“Okay, let’s go,” I say, shrugging. I hate leaving her behind, but I’m not sure what else to do. Short of telling everyone I’m planning to pay the bill, which I don’t want to tell them ahead of time, I’m caught between the proverbial rock and a hard place. I’ll just surreptitiously order her a meal and bring it back on the down low. I can let Kirsten take it to her since they seem to have gotten friendly.

“I guess journalists don’t get paid much,” Mick says, falling into step beside me.

“Probably not,” I acknowledge.

“Not thatweget paid,” Jonny quips, “but we can splurge once a week since we get fed on show days.”

“Not our problem, right?” I ask. I hate sounding like an uncaring jerk, but I’ve put myself in this position and now I’m not sure how to get out of it.

“I’ll bring her back something,” Tate says. “Kirsten can ask her what she wants. I don’t mind. I’ll just eat a burger. I don’t love steak anyway, and she seems nice. Besides, it’s better for us if we’re nice to her, you know?”

Now I feel even worse because I know Tate can’t afford it. He’s got responsibilities back home, and this was my idea. Well, it was Ryleigh’s idea but when I upped the stakes from a twenty-dollar meal to a fifty-dollar one, she had to bail.

“I’ll take care of it,” I tell him.

He glances at me in surprise but then nods.