Page 40 of Sawyer

Junie wiggles in my arms and I set her down, noticing she’s finally wearing sneakers. For the past few months, all she’d wear were the light-up, glittery rain boots my mom got her for Christmas.

“It’s a party with cake,” June announces.

“I’m excited.”

“I am too,” I say, not sure whether the words are a truth or a lie.

CHAPTER11

Ava

BLAST FROM THE PAST

The next day,Junie and I walk hand in hand to the barn raising. Despite being over three and a half, she still takes an afternoon nap sometimes. Today she didn’t wake up until almost two thirty, so we’re running late.

I had hoped to lie down myself for a bit. But between catching up on laundry and paying bills, I burned through my two hours of “free time” without so much as a snack break.

I’mtired. Then again, when am I not?

“What’s that sound?” Junie jumps up in an attempt to get a better look at the party happening just down the hill.

“That’s the band. They’re playing music at the party. It’s fun, right? Think you’ll want to dance with me?”

Junie smiles, nodding. “I like to dance.”

“I do too.”

Although I’m feeling weirdly … nervous, I guess, about this whole thing. Which is stupid, because it’s just a casual get-together of some locals. There will be food, beer, and yeah, maybe a little work involved. But it’ll be a great opportunity to meet some neighbors. I haven’t really done that yet, seeing as I threw myself into getting the Wallaces’ training program off the ground as soon as we arrived.

I really would love for Junie to make a friend or two. If we’re not feeling it, we can just leave.

I hate the idea that I’m nervous because Sally’s introducing me to someone, even if she did pitch him as nothing more than a fellow single parent. Being nervous means I care, and I don’twantto care about a guy or what he thinks of me. I’m happy being alone.

I’m a better personbecauseI’m alone. I’m not bitter or resentful or angry anymore.

I know this in my bones. And yet my stomach won’t stop flipping the closer we get.

The music grows louder as we pass a stand of juniper trees. We crest a small hill, and then the party comes into view in the shallow valley below.

I draw up short in the stubby grass.

“What is it, Mommy?”

Swallowing, I adjust the hat on my head. Figured it was only proper to wear a Stetson to a barn raising. “Nothing. There’s … wow, a lot of people here.”

Like,alotof people. They swarm the damaged barn and the picnic tables that our crew set out around it. A large knot of people hangs by a pair of kegs in rubber buckets opposite the band, while others mill around the tables, picking at the enormous spread of food set out.

I helped organize the event, so I shouldn’t be surprised. But when everyone we invited said they’d be coming, I assumed they were just being polite. Surely we’d have no-shows. Probably a lot of them, considering we were asking people to rebuild a freaking barn for free.

“The cake!” Junie shouts, tugging on my hand. “Mommy, I see the cake! It’s chocolate! My favorite! Let’s go, Mommy, please!”

I smile, despite the roiling nerves in my stomach. Mrs. Wallace is a big baker, and she loves making sweet treats for my little sugar monster. She never said as much, but I know she made that Texas sheet cake because it really is June’s favorite.

Reason number eight hundred ninety-nine why I love our little life here.

I spot Mrs. Wallace by the nearest table. She’s got a plate in one hand and a fork in another, which she’s waving animatedly as she chats with Vince, the ranch’s resident veterinarian. He and Sally work closely together.

An older couple dances in front of the stage, where the band is playing a Taylor Swift cover. The familiar song eases my nerves ever so slightly.

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