Page 81 of Sawyer

My heart thumps. “He wasn’t lit up before?”

“Ella always lights him up, of course,” Mollie explains. “But from what I understand—I’m relatively new around here too—he’s had a bit of a rough road. Cash says Sawyer is the one who took their parents’ deaths the hardest. He’s always putting everyone else first. I’m glad he’s changing that up now that you’re around. He seems …”

“Relaxed,” Wheeler says. “Less anxious.”

My chestglowsat the compliment. Even as I feel like I don’t necessarily deserve it. Isn’t he puttingmefirst whenever we’re together? I try to return the favor as best as I can, but he can be so overwhelming in his desire to please, to nurture, that it’s not an easy task.

Oh, you poor, sweet, sexy-ass cowboy.I’m gonna show you the best time ever on Saturday.

“Aw, thanks for saying that,” I say. “You guys sure know how to make a gal feel good.”

Wheeler gestures to the wall of boots. “It’s kind of our whole job. So, Ava, talk to me about your ideal vibe for Saturday night.”

“Oooh, this is fun!” Mollie claps her hands. “I don’t want to give away too much?—”

“So you know exactly what Sawyer is planning,” I say, blushing even harder. I’m going to kill this man.

And after that, I am going to kiss the shit out of him.

“I do. He required some of my, how shall we say it? Expertise in certain areas.”

Wheeler shrugs. “Told you he wanted everything to be perfect.”

My heart is in my throat now. He’s putting a lot of effort into this date.

Like, a lot.

Part of me wants to run for the hills. Sawyer doesn’t fuck around. Helikesme.

But if I’m being honest, Ilikehim too. How could I not? We’ve covered a hell of a lot of ground in the short time we’ve known each other.

Which is slightly terrifying if I think about it. I already feel all mushy and tender inside. I already can’t wait to see him again. When I ran into him at drop-off this morning, I couldn’t stop smiling after he cracked an innocuous joke that was actually very dirty—one about his coffee not being as good as it was the other day.

He ghosts me now, it’ll hurt.

He disappoints me down the road after I fall head over heels in love with him—maybe he, I don’t know, suddenly decides he isn’t so into my wild side—it’ll absolutely destroy me.

It’s not just me anymore I have to look out for. June is part of this too. So is Ella. Sawyer and I don’t have the luxury of falling apart if—when—shit hits the fan.

But God, does it feel good to be this excited for a date. I always thought my early twenties was when the magic would happen. And magic did happen in my mid-twenties, when I had June. I just wish someone had told me that the best was yet to come—that life doesn’t end after you get married, or have a baby, or go through a divorce.

In many ways, that’s when my life really began.Mylife, the one where I get to be unapologetically who I really, truly am.

“She’s going to need to be warm,” Mollie is saying.

Wheeler taps a finger against her lips. “Warm, but cute. Like a cute, cozy, snowed-in-at-a-cabin vibe.”

“Honey, that’s your story,” Mollie says.

“Oh?” I ask. “This sounds interesting.”

“That’s another story for another time.” Wheeler waves her hand. “Okay, wait, Mollie—do you still have that Pendleton coat? The tan one, with the yellow and coral and black pattern all over it?”

Mollie gasps. “Ohmigodyes! The blanket jacket! Which she can use as a jacket or?—”

“Duh, a blanket after Sawyer strips her naked.”

“Perfect! You’re a genius.” Mollie waddles across the room. “With some jeans and, like, a great slouchy sweater in that coral color to match the coat?”