Page 45 of Fallen

Clammy sweat prickled along Alex’s spine. Nathan led him through the admin building’s long halls. It was bustling with activity, still early enough for a lot of traffic going to and from the cafeteria. Maxwell’s medical facility in the back part of the building also saw a pretty regular amount of traffic. He handled most of their medical needs—provided they didn’t need anything extensive. Regular checkups, illnesses, and emergency care was handled on-site by Maxwell and his small staff. The last case he didn’t handle himself had been a schoolteacher’s leukemia diagnosis ten years ago, and she’d been in remission for seven years now.

Commander Derek Sloan’s office was located on the second floor with windows that overlooked the training yard. The door was open, so Nathan knocked on the frame. Sloan was a big man, over six feet tall and built like a powerlifter. He was less imposing behind his desk and the mountain of paperwork piled atop it. His brown hair, cut high and tight like most paladins, had a dusting of gray throughout, and his ice blue eyes regarded Alex with a carefully neutral gaze as he followed Nathan into the quiet office.

“Captain Accardi, Paladin Hawk, please come in. Have a seat.”

Alex sat stiffly in one of the cold leather chairs, and Nathan took the other.

Sloan sat back in his chair, steepling his fingers and looking between them. “I called you in here, Captain, because I’ve received word from one of our field agents that Paladin Hawk was seen entering the demon club, In Extremis, two nights ago.”

Nathan’s eyes burned into his profile, and Alex looked down at his lap. Oh God, how much did they know? That was the night he’d been too exhausted to fight the pull to Talon anymore. He barely remembered the drive to the club. If they saw him beeline to Talon and crawl into his lap…

“I believe he’s searching for the pentagram killer on his own.”

“Alex, is this true?” Nathan asked.

Relief and dread roiled nauseatingly within him. They didn’t know about Talon. Maybe he could still salvage this. He mustered his voice. “What I do in my free time?—”

“Is still our business if you’re putting your life in danger,” Sloan said bluntly.

Alex clenched his jaw. “I didn’t put my life in danger.”

“You were taught—every recruit is taught—not to go to places like that without backup. What if they’d overwhelmed you? You were outnumbered and surrounded and none of us would’ve known how to find you if something went wrong.”

He thought of Talon’s warm fingers tracing his spine this morning. “That didn’t happen.”

“Yet. But it might if you keep going down this path. Vengeance is a slippery slope, Paladin Hawk. You are clearly not objective enough about this case, just as I suspected. You’re proving my instincts right—that you aren’t level-headed enough to handle hunting this demon.”

“I was brought to the guild with the promise of revenge,” Alex snapped, anger simmering under his skin. “I was told by the recruiter at nine years old when I was evaluated that I could kill this thing if I let the guild adopt me into the program?—”

“Oh, Paladin Hawk, please,” Sloan said dismissively. “I don’t know who your recruiter was, but they had no way of upholding a promise like that. There was a chance we would never find this demon again.”

“So they lied to me? Fed me false promises in order to get me here?” Alex demanded, clenching his hands into fists atop his thighs.

Beside him, Nathan raised a calming hand, but before he could speak, Sloan said, “False promises? Are you so mistreated, Paladin Hawk? We fed you, clothed you, sheltered you, taught you the ways of God, and trained you to be a hero to mankind. Do all your accomplishments here mean nothing because I’ve denied you one thing?”

Alex’s mouth twisted, and he swallowed back all the acidic things he wished to say. No amount of arguing would make a difference. Sloan would not be swayed, and the more Alex resisted, the worse his punishment would be.

“Answer my question, Paladin Hawk,” Sloan insisted.

He sighed. Talon’s face entered his mind, smiling and content just like he had been when Alex left the apartment earlier. All he had to do was get through this conversation, and then he could go back home to Talon’s arms.

“What kind of hero can’t avenge his family?” Alex asked weakly.

Sloan shook his head. “You’ve saved countless lives already, Hawk. Isn’t that the important thing? You’ve been in the field for four years now. How many demons have you personally slain?”

Alex didn’t reply, so Sloan whipped open a file folder on his desk.

“I’ll tell you. Eighty-two. You’ve killed eighty-two demons on patrols with your squad in the last four years. That’s an exceptional record. There are paladins with twice your field time with only half that number. Is that not enough?” His glare was as sharp as broken glass, and Alex didn’t miss the warning in it.

He wanted to hear Alex agree with him. Alex wouldn’t be allowed to leave until he bowed. Blinking away the burning in his eyes, he swallowed back bile and nodded.

“Yes, sir,” he croaked. “You’re right. I’m sorry.” The words cut his tongue on their way out.

Sloan’s ice-blue eyes didn’t warm, but they brightened with triumph. “Good. It’s important that we respect the chain of command.”

Easy to say when he was at the top.

“For your disobedience, I’m placing you on suspension for two weeks. You’ll attend squad drills as usual, but you will not be allowed on patrols. I hope you’ll take this time to think about your behavior going forward. One man cannot fight the forces of evil alone. You’ve insulted the guild and your squad with this tantrum, and it will take time to earn back our trust.”

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