Page 58 of Pretty Little Fears

Wethrow the remaining ingredients into the blender and mix it up.Whileit’s blending,Aspenopens the cupboard and grabs four stemmed glasses.Sheasks me to pour while she grabs a fresh pineapple from our fruit bowl and begins to cut thin slices as toppers.Oncethe drinks are poured and topped, we carefully place them on a tray and head to the living room, with cheesygrins on our faces.I’mproud of myself for making my first round of drinks andAspenis already tipsy from the number of seltzers she’s had.

Verenasees the tray and jumps up excitedly. “Oh!Theselook delicious.Thankyou!”

Loreleitakes a glass and mumbles a thank you.Iroll my eyes slightly, retrieving my own glass and sitting next toVerena, creating as much distance as possible between myself andLorelei.Isip on my drink and it’s actually really good.Itake a few more sips, in hopes that the alcohol will loosen me up.

Finishingmy drink,AspenandIdecide on making a second batch.Ihave two more and by the time our first movie is done, we are definitely all headed towards being hungover tomorrow morning.Butwe’ve been laughing and enjoying ourselves which was the main goal after all.

Aspenpauses our movie night to refill on drinks, and she states that she wants us to get to know each other more.

“Iwould like for us all to share a little bit about ourselves.Blairdoesn’t know much about us and we don’t know much aboutBlairbesides her major and her swelling crush onEmmett.”Shesays with a laugh.

Ican feel my cheeks redden andInotice howLorelei’seyes slightly narrow towards me.Myeyebrows pinch andIdon’t understand why she looked at me like that.Iattempt to brush it off asAspenspeaks,

“So,Igrew up in a small town calledChugwater.It’sa funny nameIknow, but it's a beautiful place.I’mthe oldest of six, and we’re all girls.”Shegiggles. “Igrew up horseback riding and caring for the animals on our land.WhenIcame toBlackwood,Iwanted to live a completely different life andIhave, butI’ma natural nurturer.Iam using my assets and studying education.Ihad so many wonderful teachers who made time for every single child.Iwant to be just like that.”Shefinishes.

“Aspen, you will make a great teacher one day,”Verenasays leaning in for a small hug.Sittingup, she takes a sip of her drink and then shimmies in preparation to share.

“Okay, my turn.Sorryin advance if it gets awkward,IpromiseI’mokay.”Shestarts with a plastered smile on her face.

“Iam from sunnyCalifornia.Ihave the type of parents who should have gotten divorced but chose to stay together “for the kids,” but it was for fear of what others would really think of them.”Shecontinues, air quotingfor the kidswith her fingers.

“I’mthe oldest.Ihad a little sister but she passed away when we were younger.Shewas diagnosed withLeukemiawhen she was eight and fought as hard as she could for two years.Shedied a couple of months after her tenth birthday.Shewas really creative.Sheloved reading, writing, and drawing so in order to keep her spirit alive and well,I’mdouble majoring inArtandEnglishto keep me connected to her and broaden my options career-wise.It’sa win-win.Idon’t keep in touch with my parents too much.Wework better together when we aren’t living under the same roof, andI’velearned to accept that.Theyare your basic rich fucks fromCaliwith the rebel daughter.”Verenafinishes letting out a laugh.

“Ohwow.I’msorry,Verena.”Ioffer but her hand is up and she’s shaking her head.

“Noneed, all good.”Shesays with a smile. “Lorelei!You’reup, our little ball of sunshine.”

LoreleigivesVerenaa fake smile and lets out a big sigh. “Alrighty, let’s see.Iam the youngest of three.Iaim for nothing less than perfection and my grades show for it.Istudy my ass off because my parents would never accept less than whatIgive.Myolder sister just earned her doctorate in psychology and the eldest, my brother, just became theCEOof an investment company at thirty years old.Mycompetition is tough.I’mstudying to become a lawyer so we’ll see how that goes.”Sheexplains, blowing a raspberry.

Aspendraws the attention back to me a bit too quickly, prompting me to share, and the irritation onLorelei’sface is prominent.Ilet out a deep breath, preparing to share a part of my life thatIhad planned to keep behind lock and key for fear of pity and sympathy from friends.

“Well, a few years back, my dad was diagnosed with cancer whenIwas sixteen.Itwasn’t long after his diagnosis that he passed.Beforehe was sick, he opened up a restaurant.Itwas his dream and it finally came true.Ifelt like it was my purpose to keep it running for him.ButIwas a teenager and didn’t know anything about running a business.

Ihad applied and was accepted toBlackwoodafterIgraduated high school, butIcouldn’t leave with my dad’s health situation and abandon the restaurant or my mom.Afterhis death, she fell into a deep depression andIextended my stay at home a bit longer than planned.

WhenIsaved up enough money for one semester,Ialso decided to apply for a scholarship, and by the grace ofGodor whoever you believe in,Igot it.I’mstudying business soIcan take over the restaurant and do things the right way.”Ibreathe out.

Verenais the first to respond, arms wide open in understanding of losing someone in such a heart-wrenching way. “Mygoodness,Blair.Ican absolutely imagine how hard that was for you and your mom.Iwas broken when my little sister passed.Itwas years beforeIwas even able to speak about her.I’msure he’s really proud of you for pushing yourself and chasing your dreams while also holding onto his.”Shereassures me, the smell of the piña colada still lingers on her breath.

Aspenjoins in on the hug and just asI’mabout to respond,Loreleicuts in, her voice roaring through the living room.

“Oh, fuck this!”Loreleisnaps out.Myhead whips in her direction as my brows start to furrow.

“What’swrong?”Iask her.

“Oh,Idon't know,Blair.Maybethe fact you already went after the guyIliked.Now, you're trying to steal my friends, too!” she shouts. “Everythingwas perfect before you showed up.Whata perfect sob story to make yourself relatable.Whathappens next?Didyou build a shelter for the homeless too?”

Ignoringher rude comments,Ifocus on the one thing that makes the least sense.

“Areyou talking aboutEmmett?Ihad no idea you liked him.I’venever even seen you guys speak to each other.Hedidn’t exactly give me the impression he was interested in anyone else.”Isay truthfully.

IfIhad known she had feelings forEmmett,Iwould have never thought about getting involved with him.Icannot believe she is spewing her anger at me over some guy as if there aren’t a million others on campus who would give her anything just to spend the night with her.

Sheshakes her head and laughs manically. “Mhm.SweetinnocentBlairdidn’t know a thing.Wellfor your information,sweetie,EmmettandIwere pretty much an item before you came along.”Herface is glowing red with rage andIwait for the steam to blow out of her ears, like in cartoons.Asmuch asIwould love to get along with all of the girlsI’mliving with,Irefuse to be treated this way.

“Iwill not accept you talking to me like that.Ihave done absolutelynothingto you.”Isay, standing. “Maybe, if for just one second, you stepped outside of theLandofLorelei, you’d be able to pay attention to reality instead of the warped version of the world that lives inside your head.”

Iwalk closer to her, blinking back tears becauseIrefuse to let her know she hit a nerve.

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