Page 61 of The Smoke Hour

“What’s good, man?”

“I can’t call it, G. She’s over there,” Noel stated.

I rolled my eyes and neck as I turned to look at Noel and Smoke.

“The fuck is going on, Noel?”

“Aye, chill on that shit. The man just wanna holler at you.”

“Was this your surprise? Because you could keep it.”

Despite my words and attitude, I was happy to see Smoke. He was fine as hell in his all-black jeans, T-shirt, Timbs, and denim jacket. His hair was freshly cut, and his beard was shaped up. I wanted to jump up and wrap my arms and legs around him, but I couldn’t.

The pain on his face and the desperation in his eyes tugged at my heart, but I remained in my spot.

“You know you like it, so quit fronting,” Noel stated and grabbed his keys off the hook. “Aye, lock up when y’all leave. I won’t be back until later tonight.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” I remarked.

“Yeah, whatever,” Noel replied and chuckled.

I rolled my eyes and sucked my teeth after Noel closed the door behind himself.

“What’s good, ma?”

“This isn’t okay, Smoke. I asked for time.”

“Damn, sweets. How much time do you need? It’s been almost two weeks.”

“I know how much time it’s been. I need to work through it, okay?”

He walked to me and grabbed my hands.

“Look at me.” He commanded me and tipped my chin up when I turned my head away. “Why are you so angry with me, ma?”

Tears fell down my face, and as much as I tried to stay strong and keep up that hard act, it was useless. I crumbled, and Smoke was there to catch me. He lifted me onto his lap.

“Talk to me, beautiful. I can’t fix it unless I know what the problem is.”

“I told you how I felt about violence because of my cousin Demetrick’s murder. I told you that violence was triggering for me. I had no idea you were into the shit that you were or that you’ve hurt so many people. How can I be with you when I feel the way that I do about violence, Smoke?” I sobbed.

Smoke wiped my tears away and kissed my lips. When they flowed again, he wiped them some more.

“Listen, ma. I respect how you feel. Trust me, I do. If there were a way to erase all the shit that I’ve done, the shit that I still do, just so that I could keep you in my life, then I would. The fact is that I can’t, Fiya. But I know that I want and need you in my life. I know that these last several days have been empty and lonely as shit without you. It’s given me time to think. I’m about to make some major moves.”

“What kind of moves?” I asked in a teary, choked up voice as he kept wiping my tears.

“Don’t worry about the exact moves. I told you all the shit I do is to protect you. But what I will say is that I’m letting some shit go, but I’m not letting you go. I’m moving so that everything that I do from this moment on is legit. I can still make a solid living and live on the level that I do with the businesses that I already have. I just need you to complete the picture, ma. But nomatter what changes I make, if you’re ever in danger, I’m gonna always do what the fuck I need to protect you. You hear?”

I nodded and started with that crying shit all over again.

“Let me make it right, baby,” he muttered against my lips. “Please,” he stated between pecks.

“Okay,” I replied softly.

“Go get your purse. I’ve got a surprise for you.”

“You bringing me back home?”

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