Page 27 of One Last Shot

From my lap, Stella glows. I hope I’m not making a horrible mistake bringing Petra into our life. Stella adores her. If Petra refuses to help us, even after getting to know Stella, my niece will be crushed. And I don’t know how much more loss she can handle.

Petra takes a seat in the chair next to mine, opposite the couch Tony is seated on, and CeCe returns to join him. The conversation is less awkward than before Petra showed up, because she can talk to anyone about anything, and make it seem like she cares. It’s either a gift or a practiced skill, because there’s no way she’s actually interested in all the gossip CeCe is spewing about people they both know—I can tell by the way her face doesn’t move, the way the small smile is plastered on her lips, the way she keeps glancing at me as if to say ‘is this over yet?’ Unfortunately, it’s only just started.

* * *

“What’s the matter, Stella? Why won’t you give your Uncle Tony a kiss?” CeCe’s nasal voice carries across the living room, where we’ve gathered with our plates of cake now that our catered dinner is over, but it’s her words rather than the annoying quality of her voice that has my head turning.

“No, thank you,” Stella says as she turns her head away from where he stands above her, dips her fork into her cake, and takes a bite. The game of Sorry sits forgotten on the small table between her and her aunt.

“I don’t bite, you know,” Tony chuckles.

Even from across the room, I can see the way Stella’s shoulders bunch up as she shrinks into herself. Next to me, Petra stiffens. “What the fuck?” she whispers under her breath.

Does Tony not see how uncomfortable he’s making Stella? Or does he just not care?

“It’s just a kiss, Stella-Bella,” CeCe says.

“I just don’t want to kiss anyone, Aunt CeCe,” Stella says less audibly.

Petra looks at me pointedly, as if to sayWhy aren’t you doing anything about this?

I shrug, because as much as I want to punch Tony in the face right now, I know I can’t do anything to antagonize him or CeCe. Tom warned me about how tenuous my guardianship is. One wrong move could give them the ammunition they need to get custody, and I can’t give them that. Instead, I grind my teeth together, thinking I should probably tell Stella it’s time for bed. I suspect she’d go willingly, even though it’s early.

The look in Petra’s eyes lets me know my shrug and lack of instant action are not the response she was looking for.

She’s on her feet and heading across the room when Tony starts making smoochy kissing sounds and leaning down toward Stella. Petra’s hand is on his shoulder, pulling him back before I can say anything to stop this.

“The appropriate response when someone says they don’t want to kiss you is to back off,” Petra tells him, her voice steady and possibly louder than is absolutely necessary. “Not to use your superior size to force yourself on them.”

Tony takes one look at her hand, then eyes her like she disgusts him. She looks back at him like the feeling is mutual.Good, let her see how horrible they are.I don’t want my niece to suffer, but it’s necessary that Petra see the shit that makes the idea of Stella living with them so repulsive.

“I just wanted a kiss from my niece,” Tony says. “Don’t try to make it sound like something it’s not.”

“I’m sorry,” CeCe says to Petra from her seat at the table, “but why is this your concern?”

Petra’s look conveys exactly how pathetic she thinks CeCe is for not only being married to this piece of shit, but for defending him as he makes her niece uncomfortable.

“Any time a child feels powerless to stop an adult from touching her in a way she doesn’t want to be touched, it should beeveryone’sconcern.”

Her words trigger a memory in the back of my mind, but I can’t grasp hold of it because I’m too distracted by CeCe’s nasally voice as she says, “Oh Jesus, Petra, get over yourself,” she rolls her eyes. “It’s just a kiss.”

Petra glances over her shoulder at me as I lean forward in my seat and begin to stand. Her look tells me I’m reacting quite a bit too late.

She turns back toward Stella. “Ready for bed, sweetie?”

Petra reaches out her hand and Stella is out of her seat and has her arms around Petra so quickly it’s like she has the ability to travel at warp speed. Petra wraps her arm around Stella’s small shoulders as they turn back toward the wide doorway to the entryway.

“Thanks for coming over,” I say to CeCe and Tony as Petra leads Stella out of the room. “It’s been a pleasure, as always.” I doubt they miss my sarcastic tone.

“You do always have the most interesting friends, Alex,” CeCe replies. “Careful you don’t let people like her have too much influence over our girl. I’d hate to have to bring the fact that you hang out with lingerie models to the court’s attention.”

Oh, the icy notes of jealousy.

There is so much I want to say and it’s on the tip of my tongue, but I know she’s baiting me and I won’t fall into her trap. Petra has more integrity and drive than most people I know, and having walked down the catwalk at the world’s most famous and controversial fashion show years ago doesn’t change that. And in the few short days she’s known my niece, she’s shown her more love than Stella has ever seen from her aunt and uncle. But letting CeCe know any of that might do more harm than good. So instead, I walk them to the entryway and wait for the elevator to arrive. And when those doors finally close behind them, I breathe a deep sigh of relief.

I head down the hall toward Stella’s bedroom. When I arrive, Stella is already kneeling in front of her nightstand like she does every night. Petra sits next to her on her bed, observing the ritual we created together to help her continue to honor her mother and father. I join Stella on the floor, trying not to think about what it means that I’m letting Petra into this extremely private part of our lives. That I’m literally on my knees in front of her.

We recite the Russian prayer for the dead as Stella takes each of the wooden nesting dolls and places them inside of each other until there’s only one large doll on her nightstand. In the morning, she’ll take them apart and set them up individually so that we can repeat this moment again tomorrow evening.

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