Page 106 of Fake Shot

“Yeah,” Simon says. “The shutout was great, but I can’t believe we missed the coolest fight ever the other night.”

“Yeah, what the hell happened out there?” Gabriel asks. “It’s not like you to fight.”

He’s right, and it only reinforces my suspicion that he’s followed my career closely despite me refusing to talk to him. His voice carries the notes ofproud big brotherany time he mentions hockey.

I glance at Jules before I say, “It was a long time coming.”

“Why?” my dad asks. “What did he do to you?”

I’ve seen the replays. It’s obvious that Lester was taunting me before I gave him a beating. But I’m not going to repeatwhat he said—they don’t need to know about Jules’s past, unless she decides she wants to tell them.

“He was defending me.” She speaks up, and everyone—me included—is so surprised that we all fall silent. “I had...a thing with him a long time ago. And Colt was standing up for me.”

“Good,” my dad says, with a decisive nod, at the same time my mom says, “No one messes with our family.”

There’s a tightness in my chest that’s almost painful. It’s pride and longing and happiness, all mixed together, but instead of it making me feel lighter, I feel heavy. This trip to North Carolina is weighing on me. I don’t know why I’m so opposed to leaving her, why the thought of being away from her for four days has me wanting to claw my way out of my own skin.

Is this how the other guys feel when they leave their wives and girlfriends behind? I’ll have to ask Drew or Walshy.

We stand around chatting for a bit and the topic of the shutout comes up more than once. At one point, while my family is discussing the game, Cheri turns toward me and quietly says, “I’m really happy for you.”

“Thanks,” I say. “I mean, shutouts don’t happen often, so I’m pretty happy too.”

“I meant about Jules,” she says, and there’s nothing she could have said that would have shocked me more. “You found someone who makes you happy in a way I never did. I’m so sorry how everything went down back then.”How everything went downfeels like a vast understatement, but it’s not worth making a fuss over since she’s actually apologizing. “Mistakes were made, and I didn’t own up to my part inthem. I let Gabriel handle everything, and I’ve always felt like I should have told you how sorry I was. I know it probably doesn’t matter to you now, but I’m apologizing anyway.”

“It matters,” I say, determined to take the high road here. It’s easier now that I truly have moved past what they did. “Thank you for apologizing.”

“Hey.” Jules’s voice is smooth as she steps toward me, coming up to my side and snaking her arm behind my back as she pulls me to her. “Nice job out there tonight.”

Cheri steps away, giving us a little privacy in the otherwise crowded room. I turn toward Jules, pulling her into a hug and pressing my face to the top of her head. “I’m going to miss you so fucking much,” I tell her.

“You’re just going to miss being in my bed.”

My chest shakes with a silent laugh. “I’ll miss that part too.”

“It’s only four and a half days,” she says, looking up at me, but it sounds like she’s reassuring herself as much as me. “You’ll be home by the time I wake up on Tuesday morning. We can do this.”

“Youcan do this. I’m not so sure about me.” I press my lips together between my teeth because I’m afraid my damn lower lip is trembling with how much the thought of being away from her has me about to tear up.

“You’re going to be fine. You spent the last fifteen years traveling for hockey.”

“Yeah, well, I was never falling in love before.” I bend to give her a gentle kiss, trying to savor this moment—the way she feels wrapped in my arms, and the way her whole face softens when I admit my feelings.

“Time to go,” someone shouts from behind me, and itonly makes me cling to her more tightly. I’m not sure how I’ve fallen so fast, and so hard, for someone I’ve known for so long, but I can no longer imagine my life without her. Someday, I’m going to say the three words that have been running through my mind nonstop the past few days. But I’m forcing myself to wait until she’s ready to hear them.

And when I finally pull away and turn to walk out the door, Walsh walks up beside me.

“Does it get easier?” I push the words out through the lump in my throat, and even out of context, I’m pretty sure he knows what I mean.

“In some ways. And then it gets harder again with kids.”

I don’t tell him that Jules doesn’t want kids—a decision I’m completely fine with. I’d have kids with her if that’s what she wanted, but at this point in my life, I’m already an honorary uncle to her nieces and nephews, and that works just fine for me. We can spoil them relentlessly but still have our nights and weekends to ourselves, have actual adult conversations without being constantly peppered with questions, and take vacations alone. The best of both worlds, if you ask me.

Chapter Forty

JULES

“Ideeply regret my life choices right now,” I tell Morgan as I set the bolt of tulle on my farmhouse table and look around at the mess of fabric, vases, and candles scattered around my kitchen.

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