Page 8 of Cross-Checked

Chapter Four

McCabe

Iwalk into the rink exhausted because I couldn’t sleep last night.

Lucy called me after Abby was down for the night to tell me that even with the acetaminophen, she wasstillrunning a fever. She didn’t have any other obvious symptoms of being sick, but since she’s still an infant, it’s not like we can ask her how she’s feeling. It could be a sore throat or stomach pains or anything, really. Lucy said she’d call the pediatrician when they open in the morning and try to get an appointment.

I tossed and turned all night after that, worried about Abby, hating that I’m not the one there with her, and praying that Lucy will take good care of her.

Though I love Abby unconditionally and am trying so hard to be the dad she needs, I can’t help but think that maybe I’m not enough. Maybe what she really needs is a parent who can be there with her all the time, not a different nanny. Maybe what I need is a partner.

Unfortunately, most of the women I meet are interested in me primarily because I’m a professional hockey player—none of them seem like they’re ready to settle down with a kid who isn’t theirs.

“What the hell’s wrong with you?” Drew Jenkins asks after I push open the door to the locker room and stalk inside. He’s new to our team this year and having himself one hell of a season. He only had one year left on his contract when we acquired him in a trade from Colorado last summer, and AJ has already re-signed him in a six-year deal. Unlike with me, she had no problem increasing his salary, even though my stat line is more impressive.

I like Drew, and I’m glad we’ve locked him down. But it’s yet another reason this whole contract negotiation has left a sour taste in my mouth regarding AJ—this isn’t about the money. She doesn’t want to keep me on the team and is hiding behind the salary cap as an excuse.

She’s gone and made this personal.

Which she might not have done if I hadn’t fucked up eight years ago. Beating the shit out of her then husband wasn’t my smartest move, but I have zero patience for men who verbally abuse and physically intimidate women.

It doesn’t matter that she, as assistant GM, was technically his boss, or that he, as my assistant coach, was technically my boss. That shit’s not cool, and when I called him on it, he told me to mind my fucking business and that he’d speak to his wife however he damn well pleased.

I probably shouldn’t have hit him the first time...or thrown any of the ten punches I delivered after that. But he was an asshole, and I was standing up for her. And she fucking traded me because of it.

Once I was playing for Boston, my contract was renewed with a no-trade option before she signed on as GM. So this is the first time we’ve had to negotiate since the incident.

“Slept bad.”

“Is that code for ‘I stayed up too late fucking some random chick?’” Colt asks.

“Unlike you before Jules, I don’t sleep with someone new in every city we’re in.” It’s a bit of a shit thing to say to someone who’s a long-time friend, but I’m tired and my give-a-fucks for people’s feelings aren’t showing up today.

Besides, there’s nothing inaccurate in that statement. Coltwasthe most notorious fuckboy in professional hockey until he started secretly dating his best friend and agent’s younger sister, Jules. Now they’re happily engaged, and Drew is engaged to Jules’s sister, Audrey, so they’re going to eventually be brothers-in-law.

Colt snorts. “Yeah, because you’re a fucking saint, McCabe.” His voice drips with sarcasm. I never had a reputation like his, so I know his statement is just because he gets testy when he’s away from Jules for too long. Which is funny because, until a few weeks ago, none of us even had any idea they were dating, much less secretly engaged.

“Alright,” Walshy says, clapping his hands together. Our alternate captain, Patrick Walsh, has a big mouth on the ice, but off it, he’s a total peacemaker. It’s probably part of why he’s so happily married. “Let’s get ourselves ready for our practice skate, and save this energy for our opponents tonight.”

“McCabe, a word?” AJ says after I’ve navigated the long hallway where we walk into the arena. I tried to put on a happy face because I know everyone wants to see the players dressed up before the game—but today it was more of a struggle than normal. Even our peppy social media manager, Tatum, couldn’t get me to smile for the camera.

After practice, I went to lunch with my sister, Sloane, who’d surprised me with a text a few hours ago, telling me sheunexpectedly had to come to Raleigh for work. I’d teased her and asked if she was sure she didn’t miss me so much she hopped in the car to come visit, before she smacked me upside the head and told me it was too bad I didn’t know some geography in that “big history nerd brain” of mine. Because, apparently, Nashville to Raleigh isn’t a “hop in your car on a whim” kind of drive.

It was great to see Sloane for the first time in months and only confirmed that trying for the trade to Nashville is the right decision. But I was late getting back to the hotel for my pre-game nap, and I desperately needed the sleep after the way I’d tossed and turned last night. Then my nap was cut short by another call from Lucy after she and Abby returned from the pediatrician.

Turns out, Abby has hand, foot, and mouth disease, which was easy to diagnose because right before they headed to the doctor’s office, the fever broke and she developed a rash on her feet.

Lucy was eerily chill about the whole thing, and the fact that she wasn’t freaking out is the only reason I didn’t immediately look for a flight home after tonight’s game.

But I’m tired as fuck, and AJ is the last person on this planet I want to talk to.

“What?” I bark out. I don’t know why I let the mere sight of her rile me up like this; it only fuels the fire.

She raises her eyebrows. “Seriously? That’s how you address your GM?”

“Our history—ourprofessional relationship—is too fucking long for these games, AJ. What do you need?”

“I need you to keep your team under control tonight. I don’t know what got into Colt in the last two games, but it can’t continue.”

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