Page 70 of Locke 2

When did they shut it off? For a second, I feared Lenny might have lived in darkness before he disappeared. I swallowed the unsettling thought down and followed Locke. I pulled out my phone and switched on the light, shining it around the barren room as he settled his back against the wall beside the corridor. His eyes settled on me. He watched me as I inspected the tiny home.

My shoes crunched over strewn garbage. My nose wrinkled at the foul smell of bad food. There was mould, dirt smudges and deep cracks on the walls. A pile of canned food and more trash.

I creeped down the hallway, my sight set on Lenny’s bedroom. Locke had gone over it in fine detail. I knew what I would find when I pushed the door open, my eyes latching onto the lock mechanism as it swung away. A lump formed in my throat as I entered. Locke had followed, but his body stopped outside of the door.

He refused to come in.

I understood why. He’d tried to prepare me, but nothing could have.

Melancholy hung in the air around me as I took in the room and thought of the little boy that sat in the classroom, his empty eyes searching for me in the mornings. This was what he came home to. Even if the room had been filled to the brim with toys and furniture, it didn’t take away from the fact that there was a lock on the damn door.

A fucking lock.

Coldness settled into my bones. My teeth chattered as I absorbed the room, feeling that despair grow. The closet was utterly barren, but I couldn’t imagine it had stored much clothing. He’d often worn the same few outfits. I flashed my light at the window and walked toward it. I looked out at the small patio yard that was fenced in. It, too, was utterly barren, and I couldn’t imagine there had been life out there at all.

I took a big step back and looked away, but it didn’t stop the ugly emotions from slamming into me.

“Aurora…” I whispered, my eyes heavy with tears.

I sensed her beside me. For once, I would have given anything to feel her hand wrapped around mine.

“My room was not like this,” she assured me, listening to my buried thoughts. “I promise.”

I flashed the light on the small mattress on the floor. Lenny’s colouring book stuck out from under his pillow. A flash of his smiling face tore through my mind. It was hard to swallow. To imagine him so delighted in the colouring book, no wonder he’d looked like he had been given a present when I’d seen him the next day.

I flashed the light on the wall next and my legs wobbled.

It was too much.

The unsettling face stared back at me, and I felt too weak to stand. A shuddering breath escaped my lungs as I crouched down on the floor and tried to gather myself.

I reached my hand out. Praying to feel hers. Praying for her voice. But I couldn’t feel her right now. Not as I tried to pull the air into my lungs. My phone rattled in my hand, the lightall around me now. I shut my eyes, trying to bring myself back down to earth, but I was swallowed up in grief and mistakes.

“I should have told you to run…”

I’m sorry.

I’m so sorry.

My hand continued to reach out to her—

Warmth encompassed it as a large hand wrapped around mine. My heart burst. For a second I imagined it was Aurora, and I pretended it might have been, and my heart felt so full. Tears slid down my cheeks as Locke’s body crouched before me. His forehead pressed against mine as he held my hand tightly. He squeezed it, as if letting me know he didn’t intend to let go.

I opened my eyes and stared into his. Stormy and dark. Eyes that you could look into and never reach the end of. “It should have beenme, Locke. Not her. I should have told her to run…”

“He would have found her,” he whispered, his voice gruff.

“No, he would have found me.”

“You don’t know that.”

I shook my head. “I do. She depended on me. Lenny depended on me, too. I saw it in his eyes…his silent plea. I felt something was wrong, and I should have fought for him—”

“We’re fighting for him now.”

I wiped away my tears, feeling embarrassed as the seconds turned to minutes. All the while, he watched me, his wide eyes searching my face. All that vulnerability was bleeding out of me. He must have known how hard it was for me to let him seeme this way because his eyes gentled and his throat bobbed. He closed his eyes, allowing me some respite from his intensity, but that didn’t help. My wounds were cut wide open, and I was bleeding profusely.

I had to calm down.

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