Page 51 of Be With Me

With a small shrug, he said, “Yeah. I guess. They weren’t sure at first. It’s still early days with the therapy.”

“Then why do you think that?” A small glimmer of hope sparked in my chest. Maybe it wasn’t DID. Maybe it was something less…life-altering.

“Well, mostly because Willow told me she’s met a few of them. The alters.”

I went numb. Well, for the most part. My heart broke for him, and for me. Scenes from movies played in my head, characters with multiples personalities—or what did he call them? Alters?—going psycho and killing people. A flash of fear shot through me. I sat back in my chair, staring at this man I thought I was coming to know. What the hell had I gotten myself into?

“Don’t look at me like that, Ailee.”

I averted my eyes, but like a car accident, I couldn’t stop myself from looking and they kept going back to him. I watched his expression, the way his fingers tapped the tabletop, much like he had at the coffee shop that first time. Wild thoughts buzzed through my head. Who was this I was talking to? Who is the real Tyler? Is it even Tyler, or is this man one of the alters who’d taken over the physical body? Would he hurt me? What if he switched right now? Right here?

“Fuck, ‘lee. I’m not going to murder you in your kitchen.”

“How do you know that?”

He opened his mouth to reply, but snapped it closed again. His head fell forward and my heart jumped in my chest, but when he raised it again it was still Tyler staring out at me. And his face was twisted with his emotions. “I’m sorry, Ailee. I’m so fucking sorry. I wanted to tell you what was going on from the start, but I wanted to have something to actually tell you first, other than the fact that I’ve woken up in strange places more than a few times only to find out days have gone by. Days I don’t fucking remember. Chunks of my life gone. Just fucking gone!” He paused. Took a breath. “I wanted to tell you as soon as I got here. I didn’t mean for us to…” He stopped. “I just missed you so fucking much.”

“Were you covered in blood?” I shouldn’t have said that. But I couldn’t stop myself. “Any of those times you woke up?”

“What? No, Ailee.” Hurt and confusion lit his eyes as he drew back from me.

God, what was I doing. I covered my face with my hands. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. That wasn’t fair of me. It’s just…” And suddenly, it all came crashing down. The day I’d seen him with his sister at Whole Foods. The last time I’d seen him.

“What? What is it?”

“It’s all starting to make sense. The store.” Our movie day. I almost slapped my hand to my forehead. “I came to your apartment—”

“When?”

“A few days after you ran out on me. I was worried about you and stopped by to see you. You hadn’t called or texted…” I trailed off. “We talked and watched movies.” I looked up at him. “That wasn’t you, was it?”

He stared at me. His shoulders fell, all of the fight leaving him. “I don’t remember that. I’m so sorry.”

Oh my God. That explained so much. “Who was I with all day, Tyler?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know.”

I looked away. I wasn’t sure how to feel about all of this.

“I told my therapist about you. That you were in my life. And I’m really hoping that’s not going to change.”

I stared down into my tea, lost in my own thoughts. I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t.

“I get it. It’s a lot to take on.”

The careful control he kept to his voice tore at me. “What happened to you?” I cried softly. “To cause this?” The fact that it was real, I had no doubt. I’d met one, maybe two, of his alters. I knew I had. That was why the connection between us wasn’t there, the raw need. Because it wasn’t fucking him.

“I’m not sure. Willow says I was born in a country at war. Apparently, my biological parents were both killed there. When I was brought here, I had sustained some kind of injuries.” He rubbed his forehead again. “I need to call my parents and ask them, I guess.”

“You haven’t talked to them?”

He shook his head. “Not yet.” His eyes pleaded with me as he reached for my hand.

I caught myself right before I pulled it away.

“Look. Don’t say yes or no. Not yet. Just, I don’t know, spend some time with me. With us.” He laughed, a short, sharp sound. “That sounds so fucking weird.” He sobered again. “Stay for a while, Ailee. And then you can decide.” A muscle jumped in his jaw. “If it’s too much for you, I completely get it, and I’ll totally back off. But,” He scooted his chair closer to me and brushed my hair back away from my face. “I really hope you find out you like having a bunch of new friends all in one hot body.” His lips twitched in a tentative smile.

I tried to return it, but couldn’t quite manage it.

He swallowed hard. “What do you think?”

I honestly didn’t know. “What does your therapist think about this? About…us?”