Page 76 of The Single Dad's Guide to Recreation

I just hope Eli remembers who I am this time.

ChapterTwenty-Five

JOSH

Trusting myself isn’t going so well so far. I stayed up late, supposedly catching up on work, but in actuality checking my phone every few minutes—only to discover each time that Avery wasn’t replying to my messages. I can’t stop going over every little moment from the weekend, either. From Avery laughing hysterically while hanging upside down on the ropes course to the way she chanted my name when she came all over my face.

The only thing I can’t remember is what happened after I heard my mom say Mabel was missing. Everything from those words to the moment I held my daughter in my arms again is a total blank.

After falling into bed sometime in the wee hours only to toss and turn, I must’ve fallen asleep at some point because I wake up to screams from Mabel. When I burst into her room, I’m both relieved and worried to see her having a meltdown over what to wear to school. Somehow, my mom gets Mabel and me out the door, but we’re late enough to school that I have to endure the flirty chat from the school secretary while she writes Mabel a late slip. Then talk my child down from her worry that she’ll get in trouble.

When I finally make it to work, I spend the day catching up on emails and calls, attend three useless meetings, and stare at my computer, trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing. In between checking my phone for messages from Avery.

On the drive home, I fantasize about sneaking up to my room and passing out instead of showing up for my family but when I pull up in front of the house to find my in-laws’ car in the driveway, it truly takes everything I’ve got to get out of the car.

If I run away, they can’t take my kids from me.

Wrong, Josh. That just gives them more proof that you can’t do this on your own.

But when I walk inside, instead of finding scowling faces sitting stiffly around the living room—what usually happens when the Kingstons visit—my in-laws are on the floor actually playing with my children.

I should be happy to see it, but instead I’m stuck in a mix of feelings. Sad that Lisa never saw this. Angry that they never acted like this before. Worried that this is just a tactic to get the kids to like them so when they swoop in with their expensive New York lawyers to take them away, the kids won’t freak out.

And what do I know? Maybe the kids would be better off with them. Instead of a father who can’t seem to get anything right, they’d have nannies to take care of their every need, the best schools, all the opportunities wealth affords.

But then I remember: that’s how Lisa was raised. And she wasn’t happy.

I have an urge to barge into the room and demand to know what’s going on, but instead, I take a deep breath and count to five before saying, “Daddy’s home!”

Usually when Jack and Tilly Kingston want to talk to me, they summon me to the family’s corporate offices in midtown Manhattan on the top floor of a property I think they’ve owned since the beginning of time, or at least since New York was still a colony ruled by a king.

Until this week, they’ve never visited Climax.

They’ve never sat down to dinner with Mabel and Percy. Or supervised bathtime or read them stories. But they do all these things today. They’re not quite sure what to make of Percy’s need to run naked up and down the hall after his bath, but to be honest, this habit might be mystifying to anyone. I’m sure I look like a madman as I pretend to chase him, growling like an ogre, but my son’s shrieks of laughter when I catch him push those thoughts to the side. He loves our little ritual, and he loves when we snuggle in bed afterward while he tells me stories about his stuffies that make no sense until he falls asleep.

I don’t know what they’re here for, so I gird myself for the worst when I head back downstairs to face the music. I find them in the living room, laughing about something with my parents. When I enter, the laughter fades, and my dad stands. “I need to, uh, check some emails.”

Tilly clears her throat. “I apologize for keeping you up. We truly appreciate your hospitality.”

“We just wanted to discuss a few things with Josh,” Jack says. When my mom stands too, he holds out a hand. “You’re welcome to stay and hear what we have to say.”

My mom catches my eye, a question in hers, and I give her a quick nod.I can handle this.“I’ve got to check on a couple things too. But it was lovely to see you. Please come back anytime.”

The moment my parents leave the room, the Kingstons turn as one to face me, and I hold up a hand. “Look, I know I screwed up. Losing Mabel is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Realizing what I just said, I add, “Except for losing Lisa, of course.”

Jack clasps Tilly’s hand. “That’s why we’re here.”

My heart drops to my gut and then ricochets back up to my skull to pound in my ears so loud that I can’t hear what he says next. When they continue to stare at me expectantly, I make myself ask, “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“We want to apologize,” Tilly says. “We can’t tell Lisa how sorry we are for not being the parents she needed us to be. But we don’t want to make that mistake again with her children.”

Blinking, I try to make sense of what she’s saying as I sink onto the couch across from them. “Okay?”

Tilly looks at Jack like she’s asking for permission, and when he nods, she turns back to me. “Jack had a bit of a health scare last month.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I say automatically.

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