Page 68 of The Prodigal Son

“He’s Dad’s replacement, Isaac,” Luke shouts. Jensen is standing frozen near the door. “He’s the new preacher at Redemption Point. He’s been hounding me and Adam to come back to the church, but now, apparently, he’s trying to recruit you too.”

“That’s not what this is,” Jensen growls in anger.

“Lucas, stop,” Sadie mutters.

“I didn’t know. Obviously, I didn’t know he was…” Jensen argues, meeting Luke’s gaze. There is so much animosity between them I want to scream. My mind can’t seem to comprehend what the hell is happening.

Jensen looks at me with an expression of sorrow and regret. “I knew this was a bad idea. I think I should just go.” With that, he opens the front door and walks out toward his car.

My chest starts heaving. “No.” In a panic, I rush after him and stop him. “Jensen, please.”

With a wince, he puts a hand up. “Isaac, you should be mad. Dammit, bemad.”

“Why? Because you…”

“Because I’m a liar and a fraud, and I can never be with you the way you deserve.”

“I don’t understand. You think I care that you preach at the same church my dad did? Why the fuck would I care?”

He throws his head back. “Because you should hate him! And I am just fucking like him, Isaac. Don’t you see that? Every Sunday, I stand where that man stood, and I preach the same gospel he did. And do you know what’s woven into that gospel, Isaac? Lies. Lies about people like us. The only difference is that I’m so fucked in the head, I believe them.”

“Stop it,” I say, my throat starting to ache with emotion.

“It’s true, Isaac. Do you honestly think someday I’ll be able to come out? Do you really think I can give you the life you deserve?”

“I can’t come out either,” I argue.

“Yes, Isaac. You can. People will love you regardless, but I’ve done bad things, Isaac. I am a preacher. I can’t be gay.”

“You’re not making any sense,” I whisper with tears in my eyes. “I don’t understand.”

He touches the handle of the car door with his head down. Then, he sadly mumbles, “I hope you never do. They ruined me, Isaac. I’m so sorry.”

With that, he climbs in and doesn’t look back at me even once. He just leaves me standing there alone. The comfort and safety I felt with Jensen are just gone. I don’t know how long I stand there, watching the road after he’s driven away.

Eventually, I hear a low voice behind me whisper, “I’m sorry, Isaac.”

I don’t respond. I just let everything build and build and build. Then, when I think I can’t take it anymore, I shove it all deep, deep down.

Turning around to face my brother, I blink the tears from my eyes. I don’t know how much of that he heard, but I just pretend he didn’t hear any of it.

“I sure know how to pick ’em,” I joke.

“Isaac,” Luke says with a scolding tone.

“No, seriously.” I laugh. “You could make a joke out of all the guys I’ve dated. A bartender, a dancer, and a preacher walk into a bar…”

“Isaac, stop.”

“Then they all fuck me over and leave. That’s the punch line.”

No matter how much I try to laugh it off, Lucas doesn’t even crack a smile. He closes the distance between us and wraps his arms around my neck, pulling me in for a tight hug.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not.”

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