Page 32 of In Step

I shoved my feet into my trainers, continuing to vomit inane apologies while Abe stood there pale and shaking his head. I grabbed my jacket and bolted for the door, throwing it open to a blast of cold air that sucked the breath from my lungs and pulled the door from my hand, slamming it back against the wall.

Then Abe was there, blocking my way. “Stop, Kane. Please.”

The freezing wind whipped at my face, but Abe was an immovable object. “Please, Kane, just talk to me.” Concern wrinkled his brow, but I shook my head and he sighed. “So, you’re not entirely straight. Big deal. I’m not about to tell anyone. I’m not that guy. Come on, Kane. Stay, please. Talk to me.”

I froze, searching his face.

“You have my word. I won’t say a thing. You don’t have to worry about Judah.”

I kept shaking my head. “You don’t understand. Did they tell you about me? About what I did?” I eyeballed him, daring him to lie, and from the pause before he answered, I knew somebody had. And I wanted to fucking cry. As long as I lived in Painted Bay, I would always be that guy.

“Yes,” he answered softly.

“Then why do you want me?” I shot back. “Why dance with me? Why let me kiss you? Why kissme?” A sickening thought occurred to me. “Oh shit, is this some kind of game? Payback for what happened? Did Judah put you up to this?”

“What?” Abe paled. “Of course not. Why the hell would he do that? Yes, I knew about the bullying, but I don’t understand it. That’snotyou. That’s not the guy I spent yesterday with. And it’s not the guy I danced with tonight. But I’m guessing what just happened has something to do with it, right?”

I didn’t answer and he closed his eyes for a long second before opening them again.

“Look, I like you, Kane. And I’m a good judge of character. Please, just talk to me.” He glanced over his shoulder. “And in case you haven’t noticed, it’s fucking freezing out here.”

It suddenly registered that he was standing in the icy squall dressed in only a singlet and dance tights. “Get inside, you idiot.”

“Not until you agree to stay.” He tilted his chin and stared me down. “If I get pneumonia and die, you’ll never forgive yourself.”

The smile was there before I could stop it. “Oh, for fuck’s sake.” I fisted his singlet and hauled him inside.

The door slammed shut and he ran for his sweater, giving a shudder of relief as he pulled it over his head. Then he made for the heat pump and stood directly beneath, stabbing a finger toward the bench. “Now sit your arse down and talk.”

I mustered my best eye-roll and remained standing. “If you ever thought of becoming a therapist, don’t.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He looked down at my hands and frowned. “For fuck’s sake, put something on. Your hands are almost blue and you’re shaking. We didn’t even warm down.”

A shiver rolled down my spine at the reminder, and I fumbled to get my arms into my jacket.

“Here, let me.” He grabbed it from me and held it open.

I slipped my arms inside and he spun me around to zip it up while I gaped at him, pretty sure that hadn’t been done for me since I was five. It felt such an intimate thing for a man to do for another, like the dancing, and I had no fucking idea what to do with any of it.

Every intimate interaction I’d ever had with a guy consisted of a quick and dirty transaction of mutual orgasms, usually anonymous and almost always depressing. In corridors, bathrooms, alleys, pantries, garages, gardens, or if I was really lucky, a bedroom at a party where no one knew me. They’d been panicky, shame-filled, and risky disappointments, to achieve one thing and one thing only—a starved reminder just for a few minutes of who I really was.

Abe smiled and tipped my jaw closed with a finger under my chin. “Don’t tempt me with that beautiful mouth.” Then he patted my chest, seemingly satisfied. “Much better. Now don’t be such a stubborn prick, and take a seat.”

And so I did, mostly because I was still stunned by the idea of someone zipping me into my own damn jacket.

Abe sat cross-legged on the floor, and I slid down to join him, my back resting against the bench as I fidgeted under his scrutiny. Eventually I looked up and caught his soft gaze. “So, what did they tell you?”

“First off, it was Leroy and Fox who told me, not Judah.”

Huh.I couldn’t hide my surprise and Abe instantly picked up on it.

“Yes. Andtheyonly told me because I asked them outright after picking up this weird vibe between you all. Judah is cool and evasive if you’re mentioned, which isn’t like him. And the others skirt around the topic of you as well. So, of course, I wanted to know. Especially when it didn’t seem to fit the man I’d met.” He reached for my hand. “Is this okay?”

I shook my head and he withdrew. “And exactly who did you think you’d met?”

His mouth tipped into a smile, dimples creasing. “Someone warm and maybe a bit shy, but mostly closed off. Someone who... interests me. Someone I want to get to know.”

I swallowed hard and looked away. “It’s a nice fantasy, but you’re wrong about me not fitting what they said I did. Iamthat guy they told you about, or at least Iwas.”

---