Page 72 of In Step

My stomach lurched.

Judah, not Abe.

We stared at each other in silence, his normally bright hazel eyes dull with exhaustion, his mouth a thin, tight line. He smelled freshly showered but was unshaved and about as uncomfortable and uncertain as I’d ever seen him.

“Can I come in?” Judah’s gaze darted over my shoulder. “I can come back if you’re not—”

“I’m alone.” I stepped back and waved him inside, my heart pounding in my chest, a tight knot of worry growing tighter by the second. I wasn’t sure I was up for another round, if that’s what Judah had in mind.

He passed in front of me, looking around the small space with obvious interest. “I haven’t been up here in years,” he said, walking to the window that overlooked the driveway and the front door of the homestead. He stared out for a moment, then turned back around to face me. “You’ve got it looking... nice.”

I blinked slowly.What the hell?Had I missed the tear in the space-time continuum? That was the only explanation for the weirdness of the moment. “Small talk, Judah? Really?”

He flushed and I took another mental step back into the rabbit hole. Then Bossy, seeing the opportunity for some attention, curled around Judah’s ankles and Judah immediately dropped to his knees, breaking the tension.

“Hey there, little man. How’re you doing?”

Judah on his knees, stroking my cat, in my bedsit, which he apparently thought was nice? I wasn’t even going to try to get my head around it. I threw up my hands and wandered into the kitchen. “I’ve just made coffee. Do you want one?”

He looked up. “Thanks. Morgan has me on a caffeine limit, but I get to cheat when he’s not around.”

I made him a coffee in silence while he wandered the room, obviously curious but asking nothing. “Have a seat.” I handed him his mug and sat in one of the armchairs.

“Thanks.” He took a seat on the couch opposite me and wrapped his hand around the mug, taking a sip before frowning into the brew. “Wow, not bad.”

I shrugged. “Leroy and Fox gave me their old machine.”

“Oh.” He looked surprised. “That’s... good.” He took another sip, and the silence grew thick between us.

I let it. Whatever this was about, it was Judah’s show.

One more mouthful and then Judah put his cup down on the coffee table and sat back, running his palms down his thighs. Appearing around the end of the couch, Tank took it as an open invitation and immediately jumped onto Judah’s lap, settling himself into a ball like he was there for the day. A smile broke across Judah’s face, and he stroked the cat from ear to tail. “You must be Tank. Leroy’s told me all about you.”

I was surprised Leroy had even mentioned the cat, but I was too busy puzzling over this new and disconcerting version of Judah currently sitting on my couch. “Is there something I can do for you, Judah?”

He finally looked up. “I thought maybe we could talk... if you want to.” Judah held my gaze, but it was hard to read his expression. “It’s long overdue, and I know that’s entirely down to me. You’ve tried, but I haven’t—” He sighed. “I guess I haven’t been ready. I’m not sure I am now, to be honest, but I’m here.”

I let out a slow breath. “Will you listen?”

He thought about that for a second, then nodded. “Yes.”

I frowned. “Is this Morgan’s doing? Because I don’t want you here if—”

“No.” Judah interrupted, then winced and rolled his eyes. “Well, maybe a little bit. It’s like living with the bloody Dalai Lama or the United Nations all rolled into one.”

I snorted.

“The words, ‘it’s not all about you’ might’ve crossed his lips once or twice, along with ‘overly dramatic.’ Me?” His lips twitched.

I managed a smile for the sake of bridge-building. “Yeah, shocker. Mr Understated, right?”

Judah’s mouth dropped open and he studied me for a moment, giving me pause. Too far? Then he threw back his head and barked out a laugh that startled me and lit up the entire room. “I know, right?” He shook his head and kept on laughing.

It was kind of... miraculous, and at first, I could only stare. But after a bit, I felt myself pulled under that spell I’d watched Judah weave over so many others, which I’d never been privy to, and found myself laughing with him. It was a Judah I’d seen and knew about, the happy, sassy man, so different from the Judah presented to me through scowls and barely restrained anger. The laugh completely transformed him.

“Fuck. Me.” He calmed and regarded me with a curious half-smile, like he was seeing me for the first time. Then he sighed and turned serious.

I braced myself, but his voice when it came had none of the cutting edges of the night before.