Page 32 of Flare

Jack blinked slowly. “But you’re... big.”

I snorted. “Doesn’t count for much when you’re up against three.”

His jaw set. “Then you should understand—”

“WhatI understand—” I summoned any remaining threads of patience. “—is that getting into trouble on top of all the other shit you’re dealing with isn’t going to help. And I figure those other guys wouldn’t be too unhappy with the way things turned out for you today, right?”

“Fuck ’em,” Jack grumbled, but he looked less sure than he sounded.

“I don’t disagree. But you have to be smart about stuff like this, Jack. You can’t always avoid a fight, especially if your safety is at stake, but for heaven’s sake, how about you don’t throw the first punch when the principal’s office is ten metres away and the guy you’re swinging at has six of his mates in tow?”

Jack’s lips twitched in a half-smile. “He’s gonna have an awesome shiner.”

“Jack!”

He buried the smile. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I promise I’ll try and walk away... when I can.”

“That’s all I’m asking.”

He looked down and worried the hem of his school jersey. “I didn’t really think about you having trouble at school.” He threw a sideways glance. “You’re just always... you, you know? That must’ve sucked.”

“It did.”Like you wouldn’t believe.“So how about you talk to me instead of letting it eat you up? I know it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with, but Iwillunderstand. And who knows, maybe I’ll have some decent advice for once. Seeing as how I suck at all that otherquasi-parental shit, right?” I arched an eyebrow.

He grimaced. “I, um, might’ve been a bit angry when I said that.”

“No kidding. Look, I know I don’t get it right all the time, but I am trying, Jack. It’s not easy for me either.”

He looked straight ahead. “Yeah, I know.”

I sighed and rested a hand on his shoulder, and for once he didn’t pull away. “The reason your mum wanted you here is so that you can see more of each other. But if you decide you’d really rather be back at your old school and with your grandfather, I’m willing to take that idea to your mum and we can talk about it.Allof us.”

He stole a sideways look at me. “Is that whatyouwant?”

“No,” I said, with none of the hesitation I expected since I was so clearly screwing this up. “I love you, Jack. I mean that. And I don’t want you to lose contact with your mum. She’s made some piss-poor decisions and you’ve a right to be angry with her. Hell, I’m angry with her.”

“Really?” He looked almost surprised.

“Yes, really.” I threw open my hands. “You think I wanted any of this? My sister in jail and my nephew in pain? You’ve both had your worlds ripped apart, and some days I just want to slap her. I mean, what the hell was she thinking, right? Why didn’t she come to us?”

He nodded, eyes glassy. “Right. Like, what the fuck?”

I let it go. “But then I remember gambling is no different from drugs. It’s an addiction. And for all that I’m angry with your mother, I’m also really sad for what she went through, and I can’t ever really understand what it was like for her. I refuse to believe she wasn’t torn up inside about what she was doing. She loves you more than anything, and sheistrying now. She’s getting help, signing up for all the programmes they offer. She at least deserves a chance to do it differently, just like you.”

I could only hope his silence meant he was thinking about it.

“Anyway, we better get going or you’ll be late.” I snapped my seatbelt and started the car. “I’ll drop you at Flare and then take some marking to a café until you’re done.”

“You could take it up to Rhys’s studio.” Jack watched me carefully and I knew he’d picked up that something had happened.

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t start.”

He grunted in what I took as assent. “Do you have to tell Mum? About today?”

I breathed a long sigh. “Yes. I can’t keep stuff like this from her. But I’ll leave out as much of the drama as I can, okay? Better still, how about you tell her, tonight, in your own words?”

The silence went on long enough for me to think it was a lost cause before he finally spoke.

“Okay.”

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