Page 42 of The Science of Attraction

Someone was at the back door.

I froze and listened again as a shadow passed over the gap at the bottom of the door.

Huh.I remembered car lights passing by the cottage almost an hour before and pursed my lips. Surely not. I tiptoed across the kitchen and pried the wooden shutters open just enough to take a look.

Crap. I jumped back, my heart racing because, holy shit, someone was standing right there and I knew that face. Knew it, cursed it, obsessed over it. All of the above.

I took another peek and there he was, standing with his fist hovering in front of the old door like he was debating whether or not to knock.

Well, fuck that.

I snapped on the light and yanked the door open, gasping as a blast of frigid air hit my warm skin. I wasn’t exactly dressed for the conditions. Jules startled and almost fell off the porch. Good job. I took a second to register how breathtakingly delicious he looked in his tight black jeans and chunky rust-coloured sweater, his dark hair gelled stylishly off his face, before I glared at him.

“What the hell are you doing here? You scared the life out of me.”

He squinted into the light, his nervous gaze darting on and off my face. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, clearly flustered. “I’ll, um, I’ll go.”

He spun to leave, but I grabbed his arm. “Not so fast. My cottage, my rules.”

He arched a brow at themycottage bit, but I carried on regardless. “Two things. One, you’re an arsehole for ghosting me the last week. You kissed me first, remember? I did nothing wrong and I don’t deserve to be treated like a pariah.”

He blanched. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t about you?—”

“And two—” I spoke over him. “—you aren’t going anywhere until you tell me exactly why you are standing on the back porch of my cottage at midnight when you’re supposed to be on a date with your very lovely and, apparently, not-so-exex-girlfriend.”

I had a pretty good idea about the answer to that, but I wanted to hear him say the words.

He frowned into the dark that lay between my cottage and the machinery shed and said nervously, “Can I at least come inside?”

“Nope.” I folded my arms and leaned against the doorframe, waiting.

He sighed and stared at his feet.

“You’re right.” He finally looked up. “I am an arsehole for ghosting you, but it wasn’t about you so much as the fact I was so fucking embarrassed, I couldn’t face you.”

I blinked. “Youwere embarrassed?Youwere the one who walked away, remember?Iwas the one left feeling like an idiot and that I didn’t match up to a woman.”

His cheeks brightened in the harsh light as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. “That’s not how I feel, at all, and I shouldn’t have left things like that. I was going to explain, but then?—”

“She called, right?” I batted away an overly large moth that descended into the pool of light between us. “All right, tell me now.”

Jules scanned the dark garden once again and blew out a long sigh. “I didn’t stop kissing you because I thought it was a mistake or because you didn’t match up to a woman, or any bullshit like that.” He took a slow breath like he was steeling himself. “I stopped because kissing you felt too fuckingright. Pretty damn perfect, if I’m honest, and it scared the living shit out of me.”

Oh.

“I also knew that if I kept going, one kiss would never be enough, and I didn’t know what the hell I would do about that.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, because dammit, that was almost a perfect fucking answer. Not that I was going to let him know that. Instead, I left him standing in silence for far too long, just because I could. Then I slowly opened my eyes, took in his worried expression and the high colour in his cheeks, and gave a resigned sigh.

“Okay, so maybe I believe you. But you still haven’t answered what you’re doing here now. I’m not playing second fiddle to a woman, so if you think you’ve come here for dessert?—”

“Jesus. Do you really think I’d do something like that?”

No. I didn’t.

“Nothinghappened with Laura tonight,” he blurted, his face on fire. “I couldn’t... we didn’t... dammit. I realised I didn’t want her. Yes, we went back to her place, but when we kissed,allI could think about was you. Nobody else. Just you. I wanted you, not her. And so, I made a complete fool of myself and told her... well, everything.”

Holy shit.

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