Page 8 of The Geography of Happiness

I arched a brow and she rolled her eyes, mumbling, “Sorry.”

“Have you taken all your meds and packed your lunchtime doses?”

“Daaaad.”

I simply waited.

“Yes,” she finally answered grudgingly. “I’ve taken my meds and packed the others.” She patted her backpack. “Happy?”

“Deliriously.” I checked in the back of the cab. “And you’ve got Gabby’s snacks?”

She sighed. “Yes.”

“And your knee brace if you need it?”

Another eye-roll. “Yes.Andmy snacks, and a spare harness, and a jacket, and my other shoes. Zach said I don’t need the chair today. Did I forget something?” She regarded me impatiently.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t think of anything. “Have a lovely day.”

A grin burst over her face. “I will. Thanks, Dad.” She threw her elbow crutches in the back, and before I had a chance to even give her a hug, she’d scrambled into the front seat and was waving goodbye as Zach pulled away.

Oh boy.I tucked my silly dad heart back where it belonged, determined to simply bask in my daughter’s enthusiasm. It worked, mostly.

With an empty day ahead and nothing on my schedule, it was time for a mug of Earl Grey tea. I drank both tea and coffee, but tea was my secret indulgence, and I carried at least a dozen or so varieties in my pantry. I mentally thanked Gil for providing an equally well-curated selection in the cottage, along with a fantastic espresso machine. Tea in hand, I returned to my wicker chair on the front deck to stare across the lake, the bright blue water standing in stark contrast to the landscape drenched in a soft palette of brown, grey, and snow-tipped white.

I took a sip of tea and contemplated my options for the day.

I’d taken a rain check on Gil’s kind offer to take me on the same tour he’d given Hannah. There was just something about the handsome blond psychologist and those perceptive hazel eyes that made me uneasy. I figured I’d be spilling my guts in under an hour, and there was no way I was ready for that level of embarrassment. I’d deftly sidestepped the subject with my other friends for a solid three months. Why break a winning streak?

The mirrored lake surface shattered as the breeze ticked up and thekek-kek-kekof a hawk drew my gaze up to a blue sky dotted with creamy clouds. The bird patrolled gracefully overthe lake shore on the hunt for who knew what. But there was a peaceful rhythm to its glide and soar that soothed something in my soul, and I watched until it flew from view toward the far side of the lake.

Although undeniably beautiful, there was also a brooding isolation that clung to the valley walls in this most special of places—a stillness that called to something deep inside me. Unnerving rather than threatening. A sense of the landscape peeling me open from the inside out, like at any moment my deepest secrets might spill onto the tussock and change me forever.

But there was also something else. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, or maybe I just didn’t want to—too close to the aching loneliness that nipped at my belly whenever I sat still for too long. Or the unrelenting fear of getting things wrong. Gettinglifewrong. Hannah’s life. Or just generally fucking things up. Solo parenting sucked. Solo parenting a kid living with disabilities due to a chronic health condition was a freaking nightmare.

“Dancing Queen” suddenly shattered the silence, sending my heart thumping against my ribs. “For fuck’s sake.” I snagged my phone from my pocket and took a calming breath. “You trumpeted, oh great one.”

A bleary Judah came into focus, his fingers working through the sleep tangle of his dark hair. “You didn’t call, arsehole,” he grumbled, those beautiful cheekbones slicing through the screen like blades on ice. He was calling from bed, his pillows jammed behind his head, those warm hazel eyes fixed drowsily on mine. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

I didn’t bother to answer. My best friend rarely opted for brevity when a dictionary worth of words was available to hammer his opinion home.

“You promised to call when you got there,” he said crossly, his gaze narrowing. “I’ve been worried. You’ve been weird for weeks. Well, weirder than usual. Something’s up.” He stabbed a finger at me. “I know you inside and out, mister.”

Something I prayed wasn’t true.

When I still didn’t answer, he sighed unhappily. “Whatever. Keep your secrets. I am only your best friend, after all.”

Lord, help me.The man was a drama queen of the highest order. “I’m sorry. I forgot, okay? And nothing’s up. I’m just being me, you know, a worrywart.”

Judah worked his bottom lip and I knew what was coming. I loved my best friend to bits, but patience wasn’t one of his virtues. “Oh. My. God. It’s about Hannah going to Nolan Academy, isn’t it? I thought we’d been through all this?”

My cheeks burned. “I don’t want to talk about it. It’s hard, that’s all. She’s still so young. Maybe too young.”

Judah blinked very slowly, and I could tell he was trying not to say the first pissy response that bounced onto his tongue. Instead, he drew in a deep calming breath. “Please don’t tell me you’re thinking of turning the scholarship down. You’re supposed to be down there in the middle of nowhere so that Hannah can upskill in preparation for the big move next year, not to set her up for breaking her fucking heart.”

Okay, maybe not so calm after all.

“We are, and I won’t,” I tried to reassure him, but even I could hear the edge of indecision and so I added, “Probably.”

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