Page 67 of Strawberry Kisses

“I remember that,” I said, my voice catching in my throat. It was clear as day in my head. I’d never seen anyone as beautiful as Connor before, and I’d hardly known what to do, let alone say. “You looked amazing. Like you do every day.”

“Flatterer. I don’t look good every day.”

“Yes, you do. You look gorgeous whether you’re chilling in those ratty old shorts you still have from when you were seventeen or whether you’re fully made-up and going out. Every time I see you, you take my breath away.” I was still trying to process what Connor had said. I couldn’t believe what he’d said was true. He loved me? “Did you… Have you really been in love with me all this time?”

“Yes. Sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry because I’ve been in love with you since two days after that first shift. You came into the kitchen and said good morning to me, then you asked about my evening and told me about a film you’d watched with Levi. You seemed interested in me, not in a flirtatious way, but like you actually wanted to talk to me and were interested in what I had to say.”

“I was. I mean everyone said you were so nice and helpful and to just wait outside your kitchen, but that was all they knew. Nobody could tell me anything more about you, and I thought there had to be more than just ‘nice and helpful’, so I decided I wanted to get to know you,” Connor said, giving me a smile. “It was the best decision of my life.”

“Was it just because I was nice that you wanted to get to know me?” I asked with a grin, teasing him slightly because that was just who we were together.

“Well, you were super cute too. That didn’t hurt.” I laughed, and Connor continued. “But then I thought you were straight or uninterested, and I thought we’d stick to being friends.”

“I’m sorry I never told you I was gay. I wanted to, but I was scared you wouldn’t want to spend time with me if you knew. It’s stupid, but I thought… I’m never going to be like any of the guys you’ve dated before, and I thought if I didn’t tell you, I could pretend that it might happen one day instead of knowing you’d reject me. And I don’t want you to think I was only hanging out with you because I was hoping you’d date me. I’ve always loved spending time with you because you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever known.”

“Okay…” Connor’s voice was shaky as he exhaled the word. “First of all, those other guys were all douchebags, and I’m so completely over gym gays who only know how to talk about their leg days and protein intake. Honestly, it’s boring. And secondly, I never would have run. I’ve always thought of you as my best friend.”

“You’re my best friend too. And I’m sorry if I fucked everything up with the whole fake boyfriend thing.”

“You didn’t.” Connor squeezed my hand tightly. “I just think you finally made us do something about our feelings.”

“Like admit they were real?”

“Yeah. How could you do that to me?” He grinned impishly and then the pair of us broke down laughing. “Seriously,” he said, voice breathless from laughter. “I was quite happy pining. I didn’t want to deal with this whole angsty feels nonsense.”

“I mean, you could have just said something.”

“So could you.”

“Fair enough,” I said. “Maybe we both should have said something.”

“Maybe we’re both idiots,” Connor added. “Ginormous, pining idiots. Taylor is gonna be so all over this when he finds out.” He squeezed my hand again. “Not that I care. I’m happy I’m such an idiot because it means I get you. I mean, it would have been better without all the worrying I’ve been doing over the past week, but I think I kinda deserved that. I should have just told you when you first asked me about pretending to be your boyfriend. Or maybe before we’d first had sex. I was just scared I’d ruin our friendship. That we’d get into a relationship, and it would end up like all my others, and we’d have this horrible breakup, and I’d lose you.”

“Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere. I promise.” I leant forward, moving my hand to cup his jaw. Connor tilted forwards on his knees towards me. “You’re my best friend, Connor, and I love you. We can make this work.”

“Are you sure?”

“I am. More than anything.”

“Good, because I don’t think I could go another day without you. I love you more than… more than cake.”

I chuckled and closed the gap between us. “Then you must love me a lot.”

“I do.” Our lips met in a gentle kiss, and all at once it felt like everything was right in the universe again. It had only been a few days since we’d last kissed, but it felt like forever. How had I gone for so many years without this in my life? I’d been so worried Connor wouldn’t want me that I’d ignored all the evidence right under my nose. I wasn’t the only one though, so maybe one day we’d look back and laugh at how stupid we’d been.

Right now though, I didn’t want to think about our mistakes. I wanted to think about our future.

We broke the kiss and Connor adjusted his position, moving things across the blanket so he could snuggle up against me where he should always be.

“This is adorable by the way,” I said, gesturing at the picnic.

“I tried.”

“Did you make the cake?”

He snorted. “No, and believe me, that’s a good thing. Levi made it using a Betty Crocker box mix after I tried and failed to make you one from scratch. He made me try some of my disastrous cake, and trust me, your mouth should thank him for stepping in.”

“That bad?”

“Whatever you’re thinking, it was worse.”

“It’s the thought that counts,” I said and drew him in for another kiss. “And I love that you tried. Besides, those Betty Crocker mixes are good.”

“I feel like we should just eat the cake first. Cake for dinner,” Connor murmured against my lips. He kissed me again, his tongue dipping into my mouth, and I moaned. “Or we could skip dinner for now? My bedroom is literally three feet away. We can eat later. Or rather, we can eat food later. I really want to get my mouth on your body.”

“O-okay. Let’s do that.” Connor unfolded himself and stood gracefully, then reached for my hand.

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