Page 47 of Off the Pitch

“That’s bollocks!”

“I know, but that’s the way it is.” I paused, as the rest of my worries lined up to make themselves heard. “If I came out, it would be so much worse.”

“Maybe, maybe not. You can’t guarantee that. But if you do, I promise I’ll be there to support you every step of the way.” There was a weight and a warmth to David’s words that made me believe him. “Are you thinking about coming out publicly?”

The question was tentative, but it made my stomach lurch. I might have started thinking about it, but putting it out in the open made the idea seem so much more terrifying, especially after today. A small part of me wanted to throw caution to the wind and shout that I was gay from the rooftops, but that voice was shouted down by the rest of me for even considering something so stupid.

I couldn’t lose everything I’d worked so hard to achieve, and I still wasn’t convinced that coming out would mean I wouldn’t lose it all.

“I don’t know,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. “Maybe? But I’m still scared.”

“What about?”

“Everything? Lily keeps saying that it’s not a big deal that I’m gay. That people wouldn’t care. But I know they would—today proves that—and I’m so terrified of disappointing people that it’s just easier to pretend rather than show people who I am. I’m so frightened of being myself, of telling people the truth about me because what if they hate me? What if I lose everything?” I took a shuddering breath, all my fears welling up inside of me. “And I’m so scared that you’ll hate me for not coming out, for not being able to do that for you. I want to give you everything, but I’m terrified that I can’t be that person for you. I’ve been holding on so tightly for so long that I’m afraid to let go. I want you to have the world because I love you so, so much.”

I gasped, clapping my hand to my mouth at the realisation of what I’d just said.

I love him. I love him. I love him.

There was a pause. A moment where I was sure he’d reject me. But then he pulled me in for a fierce kiss, claiming me for his own before nipping at my lip.

“I love you too,” David panted against my mouth. “So fucking much.”

“What about the rest?” I muttered, desperate not to get caught up in the moment and let everything I’d confessed get washed away.

“Look,” said David, stroking my jaw tenderly. “I get that you’re scared because I feel the same. Being in a relationship is fucking terrifying. You have to trust someone with your heart, and you don’t know what they’re gonna do with it. But I promise you that I will do my absolute best to make you happy. Because not many people get second chances like this, and I’m not letting you go. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever. You are an amazing person, football legend or not, and I love you more than anything.”

I could feel more tears welling up in my eyes, my heart threatening to burst out of my chest because the feelings of love and trust were so overwhelming. I’d never felt anything like this before, and I’d never dreamt I could. I’d resigned myself to a life without love, and yet here David was, smashing through my boundaries and demolishing the walls around my heart.

“And what about me… not coming out?” I swallowed, holding my breath.

“I guess we’ll figure it out.” He kissed me again, stealing my breath and pushing my worries away. It was the best answer I could hope for, and I wasn’t going to push the issue any further, especially because, in spite of everything, David loved me. And for now, that was more than enough.

We traded lazy kisses together, the water lapping over us. David’s hand slid slowly down my back, squeezing my butt and pulling me on top of him. I could feel his semi-hard dick against my hip, and my own cock began to plump as he gently teased my ass, his fingers running over my hole.

“That feels so good.” I groaned, burying my face in David’s neck, pressing my lips to the sensitive skin below his ear.

“What do you want?” David asked, his words punctuated by a soft moan.

“You.”

“You can have me.” David pulled me into his lap, his fingers skating over my nipples while his hard cock pressed against my ass. “You can have anything you want.”

I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, looking down at him with a playful smile.

“Anything?”

Chapter Twenty

SLAMMED!

Manager Blames Team’s Failures

The Star

Christian

I was finally going to have sex, and I wasn’t quite sure whether to laugh or run away.

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