Page 56 of The Fly-Half

“Don’t you have neighbours too?” I asked, scraping the last bit of my ice cream out of the bottom of the bowl.

“Yeah, but I don’t know them.” Devon chuckled. “I don’t have to look them in the eye every day when I go to work. And they won’t see me naked in the fucking shower and knowexactlyhow I got the bruises on my thighs.”

“Fair point.” I thought for a second as I scooped up my last mouthful of cheesecake. “Do you like it, though? When I mark you up and make you mine?”

“Yeah, I do. It’s hot. I love being yours.”

I smiled and nodded, the single thought that had been lingering in my mind all evening becoming clearer with every breath. Devon was mine and I was Devon’s.

And I’d been living in oblivion for the last fuck knows how many years while I waited for the rest of me to catch up.

“Can I ask you something?” Devon asked as he put his empty bowl into his lap.

“Sure, of course.”

“Is there a reason… when we have sex… Okay, I love being spoiled and pampered by you, and I love that you seem really into it,” he said, his eyes meeting mine as he smiled softly. “But I realised I haven’t really gotten my hands on you or, like, my mouth or anything. And you haven’t really asked for me to suck your dick, and I was just wondering if that was something you wanted. Because I don’t want you to be unsatisfied, and I want you to be able to ask for what you want. I know I’m a bit of a spoilt princess, but I still love sucking cock.”

“I’m not unsatisfied,” I said, a little frown forming on my forehead. “Not at all.”

“But you know you can ask for more?”

“I know, I just don’t know what I’d ask for.” I put my hand on his thigh under the duvet, feeling the heat of his skin and the coarseness of his leg hair. “The truth is, I don’t know if I’m that fussed about getting much attention. I’d rather spend my time focusing on you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, of course. Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve never really seen the appeal in getting my dick sucked. I like sucking yours, but it’s never done anything for me. Maybe it was because it wasn’t you,” I said, shifting slightly as I tried to put my feelings into words. I didn’t want Devon to think I didn’t want his attention, but in truth I thought more about what I wanted to do to him rather than what I wanted him to do to me. “If you want to, you can, because I want you to enjoy yourself, but I’m not really fussed.”

“I don’t want to force you, though,” he said quickly, looking up at me with those beautiful big brown eyes. “I never want you to do something you’re uncomfortable with just for me.”

I leant over and cupped his jaw, drawing him in for a kiss. “You won’t, I promise.”

“As long as you’re sure.”

“I am,” I said, kissing him again and tasting chocolate on his lips. “If you want to try, you can, but I love finding ways to make you come. You’re perfect for me, angel, and I don’t want you to ever think otherwise.”

He hummed against my mouth, soft and compliant under my touch. “You spoil me.”

“You make it sound like a bad thing. Don’t you think you deserve it?”

“It’s not that,” he said, resting his head against mine. “Some guys, in the past, thought it was too much. That I wanted too much, that I couldn’t just be indulged… That I had to put them first or I was too selfish. I don’t know. They made me feel like ifI wanted attention, I had to earn it, even if I know that’s not how it works.”

“You never have to think that with me. I love that you want to be pleasured and pampered.” I drew him in for another kiss, brushing my tongue over his lips. “I want to give you all of that. You can be my princess, doll, and I’ll never think less of you or make you earn it. Let me spoil you, okay? Please.”

“Okay.” He nodded, melting into me. I sat back and grabbed our empty bowls, shoving them haphazardly onto my bedside table. Then I grabbed Devon’s waist and pulled him onto my lap.

We didn’t need to talk after that.

A few days later, I finally picked up the phone to message my brother. It’d been a while since I’d spoken to him, and since Christmas was fast approaching, I figured I should actually ask if he wanted to come and visit.

Jonny

Hey, you around? Fancy a chat?

I wasn’t expecting a quick reply because Aiden always kept odd hours, especially these days with his new business, but I’d barely finished pouring myself a cup of tea before my screen flashed with an incoming video call.

“Who died?” Aiden asked as soon as I hit the green button, his face filling the screen. He looked tired, with dark circles under his blue-grey eyes and his dark blond hair scruffy and askew, stubble across his cheeks, and the start of a terrible moustache forming over his top lip like someone had stuck a piece of cheap, scrubby faux fur above his mouth.

“Evening to you too,” I said with a chuckle as I opened the fridge to get the milk out, making a mental note to pick more up tomorrow.

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