Page 6 of The Fly-Half

Oh.

I schooled my face into something neutral as I gripped the bar, hoping doing my last set would stop me from saying something I shouldn’t. “Peaches?”

“Yeah, he’s one of the queens Ryan works with. Peachy Keen.”

“Oh, yeah, Peaches. Makes sense.”

“Yeah, I don’t know what his legal name is. Apparently, everyone just calls him Peaches,” Jonny said with a shrug. “Anyway, Ryan said he thinks you’re cute and, I don’t know… Ryan only asked if you were single. I said I wasn’t answering for you.”

“But did you say I was single?”

“Yeah, but it’s up to you if you want to do anything about it. You’re an adult. I’m not making that decision for you.”

I hummed as I bent my knees slightly and began my set, pulling the bar up to my abdomen and lowering it again. My muscles were already grumbling, but I was too busy watching Jonny’s face to pay attention to them.

There was a tension in his forehead, his mouth kept twitching, and his nostrils were flared. It was so obvious he was annoyed but I couldn’t figure out why. Was it talking about my dating life? Was it Ryan asking him and not me? Neither of those felt right but they were the only answers I had.

Unless… Jonny had always been protective of me, ever since we’d started in Under Fourteens and I’d been a scrawny kid throwing myself at boys twice my size and getting trampled. And that hadn’t gone away as we’d grown up except he’d always seemed to view it as his job to vet my boyfriends. Especially after all the shit with Alexandre. But we’d been in separate countries and it hadn’t been his fault the man had been a walking parade of red flags or that I’d convinced myself they were green.

And yes, maybe I should have recognised the gaslighting and narcissism and his toxic, self-centred attitude for what it was,but being that close had somehow made all the problems seem inconsequential. The only reason we’d broken up was because I’d gone away for a rugby tournament and been so busy I’d forgotten to message him. And by the time I’d checked my phone, I’d found dozens of messages, voice notes, and missed calls all telling me what a piece of shit I was for ignoring and abandoning him and how I didn’t deserve him.

I’d actually believed him too until I’d cried to Jonny and he’d gotten on a plane to Marseille to comfort me. It was only then I’d realised I had what I’d always wanted right in front of my eyes. But he didn’t want me back and never would.

That had been more painful than Alexandre dumping me, and when I’d cried on Jonny’s shoulders, it felt like I was grieving two relationships at once—the one I’d lost and the one I’d never have.

“So… what do you think?” I asked, pulling the bar in for another rep.

“About what?”

“Should I go for it? Send him a message?”

“I don’t know,” he said with a scowl. “Do whatever you want.”

I put the bar down more heavily than I’d planned, frustration rising in my chest. The plates clanked on the floor and made it shake, but I didn’t care. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, why would something be wrong?”

I raised an eyebrow and gestured vaguely with one hand. “You look like you want to punch someone.”

Jonny’s scowl deepened as he began doing his next set, like he was trying to ignore me. Seriously, what was his fucking problem? “I don’t want to punch anyone.”

“Okay, then can you tell that to your face?”

He let out a deep exhale, but I couldn’t tell if he was trying to relax or just breathing his way through the set. Then he put the weights down and looked up at me. “Sorry, I’m being a dick.”

“Yeah, you kinda are.” I picked up my water bottle, walked over to the empty bench next to him, and sat down. “I don’t even know why. Is this about Alexandre?”

Jonny’s expression darkened at the mention of his name. “Maybe? I just don’t want to see you get hurt again. But you’re an adult and you can make your own damn decisions.”

“I mean, unless I am totally celibate for the rest of my life, there’s a good chance I’m going to get hurt,” I said softly, shooting him a little smile. “You can’t protect me forever.”

Jonny muttered something under his breath that sounded like “can,” but then he pursed his lips and looked at me. “I know. And Ryan says he’s a good guy, so maybe… if you’re interested? I don’t know how this shit works.”

“You’ve never slid into a girl’s DMs?”

“No, why would I?” He looked so confused I burst out laughing. “What?”

“Wow, okay, well, not all of us are that smooth that we just have to go out in public and have people throwing themselves at us.”

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