Page 124 of All I Want for Christmas

He looked away, mocking himself in disgust. ‘You wouldn’t believe I’m usually better than this—’

‘I don’t want you to be better!’ she blurted.

He looked surprised. ‘Then what do you want?’

‘More than what you’re offering. I don’t want to have one night with you and join your list of model hookups. And I don’t want perfection. I want you to be real – a flawed, feeling man! I wantallof you. Not someone who compartmentalizes his life like it’s a sock drawer, Max.’

She came back into the room and stood before him. ‘Mess it all up, with me.’

He stared down at her and she could see the strain in him as he struggled to hold back what she knew he felt. Emotions were complicated. Dangerous. She took his hand and placed it on her hip, making him touch her, bringing him into the physical realm. She felt his fingertips press into her flesh once, then again, beginning to grip her more tightly as he gave her, finally, what she’d wanted from the start: to be held by him. Kissed. Craved.

Lost, together.

‘Five point one million,’ she murmured, reading out the latest TikTok tally, her cheek pressed against his chest. He was so warm, and smelled of sandalwood and log fires. His heart rate was only just beginning to get back to normal; so was hers.

‘Jesus,’ he groaned. ‘Why?’

‘It’s the hair kiss. That’s up there with a forehead kiss, you should know that. What were you thinking?’

He rubbed his eyes. ‘Clearly I wasn’t.’

She smiled, her finger twirling a chest hair; his other arm was looped around her and stroking her waist. ‘So you were running on instinct, were you?’

‘Running on instinct. Fuelled by jealousy.’

She shifted position to look up at him. ‘You’re being very candid.’

‘I have to. I need to be able to sleep. You’ve kept me awake too many nights lately.’ He moved his head so as to get a better look at her. His stubble was coming in; it had been a long evening. His gaze was soft, enveloping...

‘I have?’

‘Mm-hm.’

She gave a sleepy, satisfied smile. ‘Well, now, that’s nice to know.’

He chuckled, the sound deep in his chest. ‘Is it? You want me suffering over you?’

‘Of course! It’s what every woman wants for her lover. Abject despair.’ Her finger tapped his chest playfully.

‘Well then, mission accomplished. I thought standing in your hallway with a Valentino dress was rock bottom, but then you turned up to a meeting in a wetsuit with flashing antlers...Ripped my heart out.’

She laughed, and his arm tightened around her as he flipped her over to the other side of him. She felt the mood get serious between them again. The attraction was unstoppable.

‘Did Veronique really sort the dress out for you?’ she asked, looking up at him as he leaned over to kiss her.

‘No.’

‘And it wasn’t a gift?’

‘No. But I know their Finance Director and he got the manager to go in for me.’

‘Why did you do all that?’

He swallowed, his weight propped on one elbow as he pushed her hair back from her face, his knee nudging between her legs. ‘Because I wanted to,’ he said, looking pleased with himself. ‘So I did.’

‘You know this counts as a date?’ she said as they walked out of the wind and into the boat warehouse that was temporarily set up as a Christmas tree stand. He was doing a fine job of keeping her warm – wrapping her in hat, scarf and mammoth coat from his boot room – but it spoke to the level of coldness when the snow was settling on the beach.

He shook his head. ‘No, it doesn’t. A date means dinner, or...ice skating.’ He gave a shudder of disapproval.

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