“The gym. Weights and spin class. Although I haven’t been since I moved here.” Roz stretched out her arms. They still looked pretty toned to me, long and lean but with clear muscle definition.
I dragged my eyes away from her arms. “Ah, spin class. That explains why you couldn’t stop your bike, but you could pedal at a hundred miles an hour. What else?”
Roz frowned at a glass full of a deep burgundy wine in front of her. “I do like a good Broadway musical.”
I chewed on some salad. Was that it? I’d been hoping for something a little more revealing—like a Dungeons and Dragons obsession or a secret passion for Disneyland. An image of Roz wearing Mickey Mouse ears flashed into my mind and I sniggered.
Roz fixed me with a stare. “That’s all. I haven’t had time for anything else. Too busy working.”
I downed the rest of the sparkling and took a sip of the second wine in the flight. I wrinkled my nose. “Hmm, I’m not so sure about this one. It kind of tastes like tires.”
“Tires?” Roz took a sip. “Huh. I see what you mean. I quite like it.” She took another sip.
Of course Roz would like wine that tasted like tires. I looked down at the notebook and paused. Something was missing. “What about relationship history? Any past serious relationships your girlfriend should know about? Ever been married or engaged, left at the altar, that sort of thing?”
Roz clenched her napkin. “That wasn’t on the list. Next question.” She stared out to the middle of the vineyard, where a worker was bent over a vine.
I frowned. Had I hit a nerve?
“You don’t need to share any details with me, of course,” I said. “But if there’s anything a girlfriend would know, it might be a good idea to tell me just in case it comes up while Fred’s around.”
“Nothing recent,” Roz replied. “What about you?”
“Nothing serious.” I took a deep breath. “But you should probably know…” I swallowed, pressing my palms into my lap. “I’ve never dated a woman before.”
Roz’s jaw dropped. “You haven’t?”
My face flamed with heat. “No. It’s taken me a while to work things out, which is ridiculous because my sister is a lesbian and pretty much all my friends are queer.” I gulped down a mouthful of the tire wine and studied a spot of pizza grease on the table cloth.
“That’s not ridiculous,” Roz said.
My head jerked up, and I met Roz’s gaze. Instead of the judgment I’d expected, her eyes were soft. My heart kicked.
“So if you don’t mind me asking, what have you worked out?” Roz asked.
“Um. Well, I know I’m attracted to women.” I’d die before I confessed to Roz that it had been our kiss at Pryde that had confirmed my attraction. My eyes dropped to her lips.Eyes up.“But that’s about as far as I’ve gotten. I haven’t told my friends or family yet.”
Roz’s eyebrows rose. “So they think you’re fake-dating and fake-gaying?”
“Um, yes.” I scratched the back of my neck.
Roz tilted her head, her blue eyes framed by surprisingly dark lashes. “Why haven’t you told them?”
“I wanted to wait until I’d worked out what my sexuality was—whether I’m bi, pan, a lesbian… or something else.”
“You know, you don’t need to put a label on it if you don’t want to,” Roz said. I stared at her. I’d never heard her voice so gentle before. “Or you could just use a general term, like queer. Not that I’m telling you to come out or how to do it. But I thought I’d say it in case that’s what’s holding you back.”
I blinked and exhaled, lightness spreading through my chest. “Thank you. I think all my friends have just been so confident with their sexuality from an early age that I’ve been putting some pressure on myself to choose a label.” No thanks to that dating app, which I’d had to put on hold until our fake dating was over. “But you’re right. Perhaps I don’t need to.” I pushed the tire wine aside and took a sip from the next glass of wine, a chardonnay, savoring the oaky flavor. “Okay, I like this one a lot better.”
Roz lifted the wine glass to her lips and tilted it back, exposing her long neck. “Oh, this one is nice. I might need to buy a bottle.”
Swallowing, I leaned forward. “Did you work out your sexuality early?”
Roz swished the straw-colored wine around in her glass. “Yes. I was twelve when I realized I was a lesbian. Thankfully it wasn’t something I struggled with, and my parents and friends were accepting, so it never felt like a big deal.”
“That’s good.” It would be nice if it was that easy for me.
“But it sounds like it is a big deal for you. If you need someone to talk to about it, as an elder millennial lesbian, I’m happy to be a sounding board.” Her lips curled into a soft smile.