Page 59 of Five Things I Love About You

Oh shit.

I can’t let that happen. Although there seems a strange kind of symmetry in another accident bringing us together again, I can’t let him know it was me that caused an accident that day as well – because how could I explain being here again?

I shake my head and force a smile.

‘I don’t think so. I must just have one of those faces,’ I say, hoping he’ll accept it. After a few seconds’ pause, he seems to.

‘Maybe,’ he agrees.

A silence falls and I take a moment to study him from the corner of my eye. I’ve always wondered whether, if I ever did track Jay down, I’d know him instantly, despite not actually being able to picture his face. I hoped I would. Assumed I would.

Now here this man is and he’s handsome, and he seems nice. But his face is that of a stranger.

I think about the things I ‘know’ about him – at least the ones that are grounded in reality.

He’s called Jay.

He’s from Newcastle.

He has dark hair.

The dream I had about the hospital swims into my mind too, and I feel a tingle of excitement.

‘Do you have a dog?’ I blurt, without preamble. I have a sudden urge to know, as though it will give me the final confirmation I need. Understandably, he gives me a strange look.

‘A dog?’

‘Yes. I mean, I love dogs, and I just wondered whether… you know.’ My heart thumps as he studies me, a half-smile on his face.

‘I do actually, although it’s quite a weird question to ask out of the blue.’

‘Ha, yes, sorry.’He has a dog!

‘Do you?’

‘Do I what?’

‘Have a dog too?’ He stares at me as though I’m not quite all there.

‘Oh, right! Course!’ I give a strange laugh and wish the ground would swallow me up. I must seem insane. ‘No, I don’t, but only because I live in a flat and I’m not allowed one. I like walking other people’s dogs though.’

‘Right. Well, mine’s called Alan and he’s lovely but insane.’

‘Alan?’ I say. ‘Cute name.’ It’s not Colin but it’s not a million miles away.

He dips his head. ‘Yeah, my daughter chose it, after Alan Shearer. I guess it suits him well enough now.’

He has a daughter?

I don’t have time to even begin to process this before he gasps. ‘Oh my God, Alan! He’s at home alone, he won’t have been fed. Where’s my stuff?’ He looks round frantically. I spot his phone beside his watch and a dusty glass of water on his bedside table and hand it to him. There’s a huge crack across the screen but it still seems to be working and he jabs at it and holds it to his ear. After a few moments he ends the call.

‘Bugger.’ He looks up at me. ‘I was trying to ring my neighbour, get her to pop in and check on him but she’s not in. He’ll be going frantic.’

‘I could check on him if you like.’ The words come from nowhere and surprise even me.

I’m about to take them back – what am I eventhinking? – when he says: ‘Oh God, would you really? It’s not far from here.’

‘What? But you don’t know me.’

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