Page 88 of Five Things I Love About You

‘You said you were looking for someone, a man called Jay,’ she says, and I feel the blood drain from my face. Ofcourse.This must look weird to her, if she remembers the details of what I said. But before I can explain she carries on.

‘You said you’d met him in London on a couple of nights out, and that you’d forgotten to exchange numbers.’ She pauses. ‘And you said he had a dog and liked skydiving.’ She cocks her head to one side. ‘It all seems a bit of a coincidence, doesn’t it?’

I don’t know what to say, how to explain myself. ‘I…’ I start and trail off. Quick, think. What would Kirstie do?Never apologise, never explain. I paste a smile on my face and start again. ‘I guess I just got lucky,’ I say, trying for breezy but failing miserably.

She doesn’t fall for it. I glance round nervously, but nobody is watching us.

‘The thing is, I know you didn’t meet him there. He rarely goes to London and he definitely never mentioned that he met you on a night out. I even asked him, afterwards, if that was how he met you, and he said no. In fact he very definitely said that he met you in the hospital after his accident.’ Her face is unreadable. My heart thumps as she leans closer so that all her features are blurred when she says the next words. ‘So whydidyou help him after the accident?’

‘I—’

‘Were you following him? Stalking him?’

‘What? No!’ Indignation rises in me. I’m not a stalker! Why would she think that? But then again, unless I tell her the truth – which I have absolutely no intention of doing – then there is no simple explanation. I take a deep breath and opt for the least terrible of the confessions.

‘Listen,’ I say, running my hands through my hair and swallowing. ‘I did come up here to look for someone. But it wasn’t Jay.’

She’s still staring at me and I squirm under her gaze.

‘So, I, um…’ God, how am I going to get out of this without sounding like a lunatic? Could I just get up and run away and never see any of these people ever again? It’s beginning to feel like the best solution right now.

‘It was… it was my fault. The accident.’

Her face barely twitches as she waits for me to elaborate. ‘I’m…’God, stop stammering, Miranda. You’re not a teenager and she’s not your teacher. I sit up a little straighter and look her right in the eye. ‘Look, it was my fault Jay crashed his car. I pulled out in front of him on my bike, and I felt bad so I went to the hospital to make sure he was going to be all right.’ She raises her eyebrows, nothing more. I plough on. In for a penny, right? ‘I’d fully intended to tell him how sorry I was, but when he woke up he didn’t seem to realise it was me, so I decided not to tell him. Especially as… well, especially as we were getting on so well.’ I shrug. ‘I didn’t see the point.’

Jo’s face is such a mask I wonder for a moment whether she’s even heard a word I’ve said. But then she gives a small nod. ‘Right. So the other stuff, about the guy you were looking for. That was just coincidence, was it?’

‘I guess it must have been.’ I’m about to say something more, to try and justify myself again, but then I remember what Helen said about Jay’s affair and the fury flares inside me like a match to kindling. ‘Anyway, I think I’ve got bigger fish to fry, haven’t I?’

For the first time she looks surprised and I feel glad. ‘What do you mean?’

I fold my arms over my chest and sit back in my chair. ‘Was what Helen said true, about Jay’s affair? Because it’s quite a different story from the one he told me.’

Jo sits statue-still for a moment, then lets out a long sigh.

‘It’s not my place to talk about it. You need to ask Jay.’

‘Right.’ A heat flushes through my body that’s nothing to do with the alcohol.

‘But just know that what happened wasn’t his fault. Helen was right when she said Amy didn’t deserve him.’ She leans forward. ‘James is a good man. I don’t want to see him get hurt again.’

Then before I can reply, she stands and stalks off towards the table where her husband is, leaving me wondering what on earth to do now.

* * *

‘Please, Miranda, let me explain.’

It’s two hours later and Jay and I are outside the golf club waiting for a taxi.

After Helen and Jo’s revelations I didn’t say anything to Jay straight away, not wanting to make a scene in front of his friends. But adding more alcohol into the situation certainly didn’t help and now, having asked him to tell me the truth about what went on between him and his ex-wife, I’m finding it hard to focus on his answer.

I sit on a small brick wall to steady myself and look up at him.

‘Explain then,’ I say, my words slurred. ‘Because they said you were the one who had the affair but I could have sworn you told me it was Amy who cheated on you. That she broke your heart.’

For a few moments he doesn’t reply, and I watch cars pass on the road, their lights a streak across my eyes. A couple walks past and the woman gives a loud shriek as she stumbles, then laughs as her partner helps her up again. We both watch as they weave their way down the road and disappear round the corner.

Jay sits down beside me but doesn’t make any move to hold my hand, just stares straight ahead.

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