Page 34 of Sunrise Arrows

Tinsley

The drive outto the ranch does nothing to calm me down. It only serves to further ignite my fury as my mind spins round and round, picking up pieces and putting them back down until the most probable picture begins to form.

Hunter’s always been the most protective of his family but especially of Archer. He’s ruthless in cutting out people he thinks could harm them. And the night I left, I was on the receiving end of it.

I didn’t realize it was possible to break your own heart. But writing that letter did just that. It destroyed me. Shattered my heart and left me sobbing until I stopped trying to prevent my tears from splashing down on the pages of my goodbye.

Archer was rational though. He’d understand why I did it. Still, I couldn’t leave the spot where I stood.

A ring. He had a ring in his drawer. Not just any ring, either, but his mother’s engagement ring. I found it when I was searching for a pen to purge the lyrics that swam in my head after having sex for the first time and hearing Archer say, “I love you.”

Elation.

Fear.

Indecision.

I knew he’d never ask me to choose between him and my music. He loved it and me far too much. But I also knew that the longer I was here, the more my dreams had started to shift. I didn’t want to have regrets or what ifs about us, so I packed. I threw all my things into my suitcases and lugged them downstairs where I sat at the kitchen island and cried my eyes out as words failed me in adequately expressing my love for him and my reason for leaving.

“I’m doing the right thing,” I reminded myself with a shaky breath.

With a renewed resolve, my feet finally peeled off the floor and carried me outside to my car. It was as I was hefting my second suitcase into the trunk that Hunter had come home.

His truck slammed to a stop when his headlights illuminated me and what I was doing.

“What the fuck, Tinsley?” he yelled, jumping out. “Does Archer know you’re leavin’? What the fuck am I sayin’? Of course he doesn’t, because his ass would be here with you if he did!”

I closed my trunk and continuously turned the ring of my keys over my finger. In the dark, the subtle differences between him and Archer were all but absent, so I didn’t turn around when I spoke for fear of faltering in my decision.

“If things are meant to be, one year of long distance while I see if I can make it in L.A. and he finishes school won’t break us.”

“Fuckin’ bullshit!” he spat. Hunter yanked my arm and turned me to look at him. He was right in my face, inches away, when he said, “You know, I told Archer I wasn’t so sure about you. That you’d be packing up at the end of summer and leavin’ him behind. Probably make some grand declaration about lovin’ him forever only to dump him three months in for some Hollywood pretty boy who could elevate your name. He didn’t want to listen though.

“He kept bringin’ you around, and I eventually believed your shit too.” He stepped back and scrubbed his hands over his face, pacing a few steps away from me. “Jesus fuckin’ Christ, Tinsley. Just get back in the house.Please.You’re gonna break his heart otherwise. Just go back inside and we can pretend like this didn’t happen.”

I didn’t know when my tears came back, only that they did as I hiccuped, “I can’t, Hunter. Stayin’ might just ruin us.”

“If you leave, I’ll make sure it does,” he warned.

I didn’t listen. Instead, I got in my car and, at two in the morning, started making my way to L.A. I cried the whole way and for an entire year waited by a phone that never rang, until finally, I threw it in Berry Lake when I lost what remained of my hope.

That was the day I gave in to my label and let them make me into the Tinsley Jacobs the world knows.

If it had just been me, I could forgive Hunter. He was protecting his brother by doing what he thought was best at the time. But after what Ames had said, about how deeply it affected Archer, Hunter’s actions only enrage me further. He let his brother suffer, watched him day in and day out as he waited for me and never told him the truth. Took things even further and kept me away when I proved him wrong and returned.

The SUV hasn’t even come to a stop outside of the converted stables when I’m hopping out and cutting a scorching path inside, ready to cut through to the paddocks beyond. At the cross of the stable, I pause. The melancholic mashup of my songs “Have Me Now” and “Ever After Was Once Upon A Time” are filtering out from Archer’s office, the God-given baritone of his voice that would have Nashville falling at his feet if they knew accompanying my words. The rich, sweet lure of him mere feet from me, singing two of my most precious songs, is hard to resist. I want to abandon my reason for being here and go to him.

It’s how I assume sailors must have fallen prey to sirens.

It would be easy enough to let it go and follow him. I think I would be okay without confirming the conclusions I’ve reached. I could lay it all to rest now and move on with Archer from here. The first page of a blank book waiting to be filled.

But as sure as I am standing here listening to him and feeling how quickly I turn weightless, ready to fall back into him regardless of my reservations, I know I can’t let it go. It won’t make a difference in how much tighter I plan to hold on to Archer this time around, but I need the peace that comes with knowing for sure, one way or the other.

“Is that Archer?” Briar whispers at my side, the normal click of her heels silent on the wood floors as she listens, too.

I nod my head, not wanting to disturb the way he’s unknowingly calling me home to him.

“Wow…”

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