Page 34 of Under My Skin

I grab her hand and lace our fingers together as we walk to my truck. I open the door for her and make sure she’s buckled in before I walk around the back.

I jump in and notice Lizzie is wringing her hands together, clearly nervous. I take this opportunity to really look at her and then frown when I don’t see what I like.

“Can you do me a favor, Lizzie?” I ask.

She looks over at me and nods. “Sure.”

“Never cover up your freckles around me again,” I say while grazing my fingers over her cheek where I know her freckles are hiding.

“Why?” she asks with a heavy breath.

“Because they’re one of my favorite things about you.”

I move in close and brush my lips over hers. Not quite a kiss because I don’t want to share our first kiss in a parking lot after she’s been on a date with another man, but I need something to hold me over during the ride home.

“Believe it or not, Lizzie, I really fucking like you. I keep trying to talk myself out of making a move because we’re at very different points in our lives. You’re ten years younger than me. I’m newly divorced with two kids and not looking for anything serious.”

She looks up at me, our mouths almost touching. “The age gap doesn’t bother me, Cameron, and I never said anything about being serious,” she says, and I can’t help myself when I lean in again for one more peck. It’s chaste and short, and I instantly want more.

“How about we talk more about this on the way home, yeah?” I ask against her lips.

“How about we do it right now?” Her voice is just a whisper and the vibration on my lips goes straight to my cock.

When I lean back and see how blown her pupils are and how her breath is coming out in little pants, I know that this woman has the power to ruin me.

I just need to decide if I want it to happen or not.

16

LIZZIE

Cameron’s lipsjust touched mine and I feel like I’m floating. It has to be a dream because this can’t be happening in real life. Especially after the past twenty-four hours. I mean, the mixed signals from this man are giving me whiplash.

I just experienced the worst date of my life, if I can even call it that since we never sat down at a table. I got ditched by Brian before the date even started, which was a relief, but I was also beyond embarrassed since it all played out in front of Cameron.

So how did we get from there to here?

How has my night turned into me sitting next to Cameron in his truck, him complimenting me, expressing his feelings for me, and then kissing me?

Did he kiss me though? Did that even count as a kiss? Shouldn’t there have been more pressure and contact for it to be an actual, proper kiss? It felt like more of a graze. A peck.

Damn it, I want more.

“What are you overthinking in that head of yours?” Cameron asks, bringing me back to reality.

“Why didn’t you kiss me? Like,reallykiss me?” I ask, needing to get to the bottom of this. No more games. Just blunt questions and honest answers.

“Because I didn’t want our first kiss to be because of everything else that happened on this weird, fucked-up night. I want it to be after you’re finally convinced that there’s something going on between us. That it’s not one-sided. Because no matter how hard I try, I can’t get you out of my head, Lizzie.”

“Why are you trying so hard to get me out of your head if you’re supposedly interested in me?” I ask, turning to face him.

“I have too much on my plate right now, Lizzie. My dad just died, my divorce just got finalized, and I’m full-on renovating my house in the middle of corn season. And let’s not forget, I have two little girls who depend on me for everything. I’m both mom and dad to them now, and I can’t fuck that up. They’ve been through enough, and they need to come first.” He takes a deep breath, and I see the turmoil in his eyes. “I’m not capable of giving you the happily ever after you’re looking for and deserve, Lizzie, and I don’t even know if I have it in me to be just a fuck buddy. It would be selfish of me to pursue this…” He runs his hands through his hair and lets out an exasperated sigh. “But I can’t stomach the thought of you with anyone else.”

My stomach is doing backflips, and I’m pretty sure my eyes are huge at the wordsfuck buddy. For the hundredth time since the moment in the kitchen, I’m wondering if I should come clean about my lack of experience. If I should let him know that I ran out on him not just because I didn’t know how to act but because I felt like I was in way over my head.

“I mean, I’m jealous of any guy who looks at you, even though I know I have no right to be. I want you all for myself, even though I can’t promise you anything. All of it makes me feel like an asshole. And I’ll never forgive myself if I break your heart, Lizzie.” He reaches across the console and runs his very large hand up my thigh. “But I can’t fucking resist you.”

I’m frozen in place. I don’t know if he’s expecting me to tell him to finally pursue me or let me go. Because I know what my answer is.

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