Page 52 of Under My Skin

“This is Lizzie Montgomery we’re talking about, Cam. The fucking girl next door. The girl who was half in love with you before you even went pro. Before all the money and the awards. She doesn’t want you for your money or the glam life. She’s not going to hurt Addy and Mackenzie or leave them behind. Take a fucking chance already and stop torturing the both of you. Follow your heart and stop being so fucking scared.”

Reid finishes his tirade, and I feel like my heart has dropped into my stomach. Iamscared. And I know, deep down, that Lizzie won’t hurt me, but I also know that I’m flawed and damaged. Putting my heart on the line, as well as my daughters’, is a lot to ask.

But maybe, just this once, I have to see where it takes me.

“You’re right. Help me say goodbye to everyone so I can go get my girl.”

* * *

An hour later,I finally make it back home. Lizzie’s barn is dark, and I’m questioning whether she’s home or if she went with Lia somewhere.

Not giving myself a chance to second-guess or talk my way out of this, I make my way across the space between our houses and past the tree that Lizzie and I have made our own. I step in front of her door and wipe my sweaty palms down my jeans before knocking three times. As I listen closely, there’s no sound, and I begin to worry she’s not here.

Just as the fear really starts to creep in, I hear feet shuffling on the other side of the door. Ten seconds later, the locks turn, and the door opens.

Lizzie is standing there in a pair of sweatpants and a tank top with her hair down and wet like she just got out of the shower. I’m immediately hit with her scent of lavender and vanilla, and it takes everything I have not to move into her and inhale from the source.

“Hey, Lizzie.”

“Hey, Cameron.” She sounds exhausted, and I can tell she’s over all the drama from the last twenty-four hours.

But she’s calling me Cameron and not Cam. That’s got to be a good sign, right?

“Thank God we’re back to Cameron,” I mutter with a laugh, trying to lighten the mood. I’m met with silence as she looks down and shuffles her bare feet on the floor, all her fight from earlier clearly drained.

“I’m sorry, Lizzie. I know that’s not going to cut it. I fucked up, but I’m here to make it right.”

She looks at me now. Her big green eyes lock with mine before she speaks. “Maybe it’s best if we just stick to being friends. I don’t think I have it in me for all this back and forth.”

“I can’t do that, baby. I’ve tried doing that too many times now, and every time was a mistake. I want you so bad that I keep fucking up because I’m so out of my element here. And scared. I’m so fucking scared.” My voice catches on the last part. Finally admitting it out loud is cathartic and nerve-racking all at once.

“You’re scared of me? Of this?” she asks while moving her hands between us, total confusion in her voice.

“Hell yeah, I am. You scare the shit out of me, Lizzie. You have the power to absolutely ruin me if I’m not careful. I’m putty in your hands. Can’t you see that?” I run my hands through my hair in frustration because I know I’m not expressing how I feel the right way. I just don’t know how to say it.

“No. I can’t see it. Every time I turn around, you seem to feel differently about me. You’re so hot and cold that I can’t keep up.”

She’s angry, so I take a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts so I say the right thing for once.

“I haven’t felt this way before, Lizzie. You’re different, and I don’t know how to handle it.”

“Different how?” There’s defiance in her voice now. She isn’t going to be easily convinced, and I don’t blame her. I’ve been a complete asshole and deserve everything she’s throwing at me. I might as well let it all out now. Really tell her how I feel.

“You get me, Lizzie. The real me. The farm boy from Brantley Falls who only dreamed about playing football. The single dad who will do anything for his two little girls so they don’t have to experience the pain of someone walking out of their life again. You want the same things as me. An easy fucking life, enjoying the simple shit. Here in our hometown. God, everything is just right with you.” I take a step closer to her, inhaling her scent and refilling my lungs so that I can keep pouring my heart out. “I’m fucking obsessed with you. All I do is think about you. Your kindness, your laugh, your freckles. The way you are with my girls,” I say. “I have to protect them, but I also know I have to trust you. I know you’d never hurt them and disappear like their mom. Even if this goes nowhere, you’ll still be here for them.”

She smiles slightly, but I can still sense her hesitation.

All of a sudden, I think back to when I told Lizzie to show me how she felt. I have to do that now for her.

So I place my hands on each side of her face and crash my lips against hers. She tenses up for a second, like she didn’t see it coming, but then completely melts into me.

I coax her mouth open with my tongue and start kissing her like I do in all my fantasies. She moans into my mouth, and that does it for me. I have no self-control left. I move my hands down her body and lift her up, squeezing her toned thighs and imagining them wrapped around my head while I feast on her.

When Lizzie immediately loops her legs around my waist, it feels like the most natural thing in the world. Lizzie’s body all tangled up in mine is how it’s meant to be. I walk us back a step and push her into the frame of her front door, keeping my body locked between her spread legs.

“Tell me this is okay, Lizzie,” I break the kiss and ask against her lips. “I fucked up so bad, but there’s no denying this—denying us. I’m so far gone for you, Lizzie Montgomery. Let me fucking prove to you how good we can be together. Just give me a chance.”

She shakes her head up and down, clearly agreeing, but that’s not going to cut it.

---